i fall in love so easily




do


all


males


think


infatuation


is


love?




fall


in


and


out


as


children


do




don't


try


to


maintain


the


quality




but


discard


it


for


the


cheap


and


new




what


hope


does


real


love


have




in


the


hands


of


such


a


child









































christmas!



ultimate


proof


that


life


is


empty









































happiness


is


the


absence


of


intellect









































expecting


lifes


eventualities


does


not


make


for


coping


with


their


arrival


any


easier









































you


so


distanced



i


a


foreign


country









































what


do


you


offer


that


i


would


give


up


my


freedom



infinity


given



love


cataclysmic









































like


children


we


push


each


others


boundaries



both


bruising



we


remain









































to


betray


one


lover


only


to


find



the


second


wasn't


worth


the


price









































people


talk


of


being


suckered


but


for


this


to


happen




first


they


must


sucker


themselves









































who


say


you


this


not


be


a


gift


from


infinity




why


not


the


tender


whispered


words




why


not


the


warm


embrace









































you


already


have


russia's


wives


did


you


imagine


her


gentle









































so


out


of


touch


with


reality




dresses


up


what


he


won't


see



that


he


is


merely


like


you


and


me



ignoble


unrefined


and


crude


as


can


be




with


desires


and


appetites


he


wants


to


make


free









































i


fall


in


love


very


easily



clutching


his


heart


so


piously



ever


blind


will


he


never


see




real


love


not


them


but


me









































adolescent


infatuation


is


falling


in


love


with


imagination



your


own



and


when


you


read


the


words


above



ask


yourself


is


that


really


love?









































he


doesn't


do


love



he


does


infatuation



falling


fast


and


ferverantly



for


girls



women


are


too


old



too


cold



too


real


and


made


of


steel



drive


too


hard


both


hands


on


the


wheel










































what's


the


differance


between


a


discussion


and


an


argument




is


a


discussion


when


both


parties


want


to


talk



and


an


argument


when


only


one


of


them


does?









































illusions


shattered


mirror


shards


scattered


rending


self


image









































is


what


we


end


up


with


 love?



or


some


close


     approximation...











































idols


don't


just


have


feet


of


clay


and


topple


with


a


resounding


crash









































if


a


woman


sticks


with


a


man


thro


thick


and


thin


into


old


age



expecting


emotional


reward



she


will


be


disappointed



what


she


gets


is


comments


on


her


aging


from


an


old


man


that


wants


young


girls









































no


matter


how


much


bull


shit


you


go


thro


with


a


man



there


is


always


more


to


come









































there


doesn't


have


to


be


a


reason


to


dislike


men




they


are


reason


enough









































even


cells


in


a


petri


dish


excrete


waste...









































the


night


thick


with


darkness


only


moon


and


stars


for


light









































her


face


wrinkled


like


crepe


paper


white


hair


a


gossamer


mist









































her


harsh


wounded


outbursts


masquerading


as


laughter









































the


morning


moon


a


thin


pale


ghost









































christmas


is


depressing



if


you


can't


see


the


family



depressing


if


you


can


;o)









































molten


sun


sets


the


sky


on


fire



wreaths


of


purple


plume









































if


you


run


from


problems


trouble


follows









































if


you


want


a


man's


attention


talk


like


a


woman




if


you


want


him


to


get


the


message


talk


like


a


man









































what


we


do


is


often


unrelated


to


what


we


know









































the


night


sharp


cold


and


still



a


bone


white


moon


hangs


high









































what


we


have



with each other



is


complex


and


unfathomable



an attachment



as constant


as


it


is


conflicted









































an explanation


often


doesn't fit



any template


of


rhyme or reason









































old


age!



all


the


juice


and


venom


gone



maybe not all the venom ;o)









































lovers


are


always


more


and


less


than


we


imagine









































there


is


a


hard


part


of


me




it's


old


and


scarred


over









































all


addictions


whatever


they


be


take


part


of


you


away


from


your


loved


ones









































you


can't


have


genius


without


a


measure


of


insanity









































intellectual


intelligence


is


a


process


quite


apart


from


emotional


response




having


a


lot


of


the


first


doesn't


govern


the


second


or


mean


they


are


in


equal


distribution









































so


much


of


our


lives


is


consumed


by


each


other


together


or


apart









































EGO


the


biggest


barrier/blind


of


all


?









































lovers....



they


can


flatter


with


expertise



get


in


your


good


graces


one


minute



then


disembowel


you


the


next...









































this relationship isn't going anywhere



going


any


 where?



where


do


relationships


go


?




after


a


while


they


just


lie


there









































snow


f

a

l

l


brittle


r

a

i

n









































nothing


begins


or


ends


in


life


and


what


is


far


away


is


next


to


you









































what's wrong


with


living


in


the


head



is


lack


of


personal


experience



theory


alone


doesn't


give


enough


of


the


picture



in


fact


that's


often


all


it


gives









































i've


dreamed


of


jumping


freight


trains


and


altho


i


never


have




i


stay


on


the


wagon


of


more


than


one


train




they


go


in


all


directions









































nothing


of


life


is


static


every


aspect


can


change


within


an


instant



health


relationships


attitudes ...









































males


and


females


alike


utilize


each


others


vanity


as


a


vehicle


to


their


own


desires









































the


male


ego


is


a


particularly


un


appealing


creature


altho


extremely


useful


to


the


female









































there


are


always


huge


divides


of


thinking


in


all


relationships


that


are


glossed


over


otherwise


there


would


be


no


relationships


only


interactions









































to


live


within


some


boundaries


is


not


to


be


entirely


normal


it's


merely


to


live


within


some


boundaries









































without


some


boundaries


we


would


sink


into


depravity


and


lawlessness









































if


we


lived


in


a


world


without


boundaries


we


wouldn't


get


to


pick


which


ones


those


were


to


suit


ourselves









































theorizing


something


is


not


enough


to


know


it


you


have


to


live


it


to


know


it









































is


to


desire


insanity


or


desire


to


be


regarded


as


insane


insanity


or


affectation ?









































to


desire


to


be


outside


of


all


boundaries


insanity


or


merely


over


jaded


?









































i've


been


outside


of


enough


boundaries


to


know


just


being


outside


all


of


them


merely


to


experience


is


too


damaging


to


self


and


others


therefore


not


intelligent









































it


takes


having


been


outside


of


boundaries


to


gain


the


intelligence


to


see


being


inside


some


boundaries


is


more


intelligent


than


being


outside


of


them









































it


takes


more


than


thinking


talking


and


writing


about


being


outside


of


boundaries


to


be


outside


of


boundaries









































the


revelation


is


that


there


is


no


revelation


only


the


struggle


towards


light









































happiness


is


but


a


fleeting


kiss



a


breathe


of


air



random


surreal









































the


smell


of


your


skin



a


narcotic









































like


sea


fog


shrouded


frozen


waves


misty


hills


undulate


into


the


distance









































why


does


man


see


fit


to


tell


a


woman



she's


lost


her


youthful


glow




a


woman


doesn't


tell


a


man


when


his


aging


starts


to


show









































white


clouds


scribbled


across


blue


sky




grey


clouds


dribbled


on


you


and


i









































oh


the


ease


of


being


lofty


when


detached


from


oneself



no


pain


or


pleasure


to


be


gained


when


sitting


on


that


shelf









































what


man


desires


above


all


else


from


a


woman  besides physical beauty


is


protection


from


the


truth









































and


still


he


doesn't


change



despite


all


he


has


learned




gives


heart


and


soul


to


murderous


bitches




as


long


as


they


are


vision


fair









































the


only


saving


grace


man


has


is


his


usefulness


;o)









































some


people


seem


to


live


their


lives


in


a


posthumous


fashion



inert


uninspired



disillusionment


their


only


mantle









































jealousy



that


most


corrosive


of


emotions



gnaws


at


the


gut



giving


greater


pain


than


failure


loss


hatred


or


despair









































he


looks


at


the


world


through


eyes


both


interested


and


interesting




hazy


green


and


as


deep


as


the


ocean









































love


can


turn


you


inside


out



and


make


it


hard


to


breathe









































real love


is


the


hard yards



the


stretched


too thin



the


warts and all




not


fantasy


mixed with lust




mere


self


gratification









































nostalgia


takes


over


where


hope


leaves


off









































we


are


angels


and


monsters


both


you


and


i









































when


the


first


frission


of


sexual


attraction


fades


it's


not


the


end


of


love


but


possibly


the


beginning


of


it









































we


give


our


lives


in


service


to


a


chimera


despite


knowing


this


fact









































the


mind


invents


strategies


to


cope


trouble


begins


when


the


strategies


obliterate


the


truth









































the


mind


is


a


curious


creature


and


frequently


acts


like


a


distorting


mirror



it


denies


contorts


refashions


and


forgets









































the


mind


builds


bulwarks


against


the


possibility


of


a


person


losing


what


gives


their


world


definition





OR





the


mind


builds


bulwarks


against


the


possibility


of


losing


long


held


beliefs









































remembering


the


past


doesn't


prevent


it


from


being


repeated









































there


is


no


wrong


decision


only


what


we


decide


and


what


we


learn


from


it









































the


world


is


not


a


place


wherein


you


can


depend


on


people


to


have


common


sense


instead


fear


and


slyness


abound









































fragrances


can


transport


you


to


lands


you've


never


been


to


mingle


with


people


you'll


never


know









































women


are


a


bit


like


cars


to


men




they


want


all


the


ones


they


fancy


in


the


sales


yard




make


a


purchase


and


as


soon


as


she's


out


of


the


salesyard



she's


devalued...



and


as


she


ages


sometimes


they


trade


her


in









































i


see


the


stars


set


in


your


eyes









































whoever


said


men


don't


have


time


for


feelings


was


wrong



they


do



hungry


horny


tired


;o)









































words


should


be


chosen


as


carefully


as


friends









































men


you


seem


so


contradictory




want


dewy


eyed


admiration


but


when


that's


expressed




it's


often


met


with


stoney


silence




what


is


that


??









































there's


not


a


lot


that's


real


about


what


a


man


really


wants


from


a


woman




but


men


don't


really


see


women


as


real


anyway









































one


persons


challenge


can


be


 another's


excuse









































life


is


so


absurd


yet


still


we


cling


to


it









































when


in


argument


foolish


is


the


man


who


thinks


he


can


better


a


woman


at


anything


;o)









































don't


break


on


the


wheel


of


personal


disaster









































if


you


are


a


male


and


not


a


parent


there


are


some


things


you


will


never


see


or


understand


and


in


fact


some


males


even


as


parents


won't









































the


whole


world


fades


away


when


you


submit


to


the


constricting


embrace


of


an


obsession









































so


alike


yet


unalike



perfect


and


impossible









































kids


of


today


just


want


to


play


and


play




think


i


like


therefore


i


am



is


all


they


have


to


say









































love


comes


crashing


down









































don't


think


about


love


it


only


makes


you


cry









































your


eyes


are


so


deep


i'm


scared


to


step


into


them









































sometimes


i


fall


into


the


black


pit


and


can


only


look


up


at


the


rim



and


you


my


north


star









































trying


so


hard


to


stay


steps


ahead




i


feel


the


tide


lapping


at


my


feet









































 i


have


two


lives


they


run


concurrent



satiating


desire


for


life


and


death









































throwing


pebbles


into


a


pool


they


sink


to


the


bottom


like


the


discarded


beliefs


of


childhood









































the


sunlight


has


gone



the


night


never


ends



hopelessness


decends


like


a


shroud









































sex


will


accommodate


itself


to


any


amount


of


unusual


couplings









































where


you


want


your


money


to


go


and


where


it


does


go


are


different


places









































one


year


of


marriage


four


seasons


in


hell









































while


communicating


with


a


woman


a


man


will


find


himself


speaking


about


one


thing


while


trying


to


read


the


subtext


of


another


;o)









































the


ocean


swells


buckle


and


heave



forming


mountains


and


valleys



an


ever


changing


liquid


landscape









































new


life



old


dream




what


do


they


mean









































the


sky


a


 panorama


of


 mountain


ranges




purple


grey


and


white


clouds


swelled


into


a


landscape









































it's


a


hard


battle


seeing


what


is


and


what


isn't




what


is


and


what


isn't



what


is




what


isn't









































i


have


to


be




the


two


of


me









































starling


chicks



fallen


down


the


wall


cavity



the


sounds


of


dying


baby


birds


for


the


next


3


days ...









































unhand


me


foul


life




i


fend


off


your


embrace




'tis


deaths


sweet


breath




i


would


feel


on


my


face









































livid


edged


clouds


drop


great


globules


of


rain


leaving


coin


spots


on


the


cement




lightning


springs


from


dark


curves


as


cloud


canopy


splits


rain


sheets


down









































fractured


hairy


fairy




leaping


over


toxic


toadstools




do


you


see


yourself









































my


love


can


only


be


fractured




with


glimses


of


a


unity


that


might


have


been




to


touch


infinity


and


see


it


all


around









































why


punish


me


for


your


own


mind


set



it


is


your


mind


set



or


is


that


why...









































you


look


up


at


the


stars


and


infinity


but


are


entrenched


in


the


gutter









































midges


spiral


in


the


sun



molecules


in


motion









































it's


so


much


easier


to


sink


into


hell


than


ascend


to


heaven




some


are


born


to


it









































one


of


the


saddest


aspects


of


aging


is


the


loss


of


surprise




altho


you


never


actually


lose


that




infinity


always


surprises




just


less


often


;o)









































there


is


no


black


and


white



there


are


only


shades


of


grey




though


we're


taught


when


young


to


believe


it's


so



life


could


never


be


that


way









































emotions


stockpiled


to


hurl


at


his


head



don't


shatter


like


glass