this is work in progress or homilies or miscellaneous items

that don't warrant a page by themselves

or seem to fit better here



pending poems  index



chronological order is from the bottom to the top of the page



audio files are best listened to  with the eyes closed !



the layout is done with the internet explorer text size setting at  largest  and with a zoom of 125%, and my text rendering is done for these settings though they should be somewhat tolerant of a zoom setting or two up or down


















i can cope with people who disagree with me better than people who agree with me



why


i


don't


know


or


i


can


guess


:


o


)




it brings emotions up i can't cope with


what people normally seek emotionally with me is all jangled and dissonant
















i can cope with people who disagree with me better than people who agree with me


:


o


)


(
















the use of the word  “shikantaza”  is meaningless because it has to be  “i practice shikantaza”  and anything referenced off the  “ i ”  in this context is meaningless
















some nut in florida was going to get a gun and shoot me with uranium depleted bullets, he had a photo of himself on the web brandishing a pistol, i located his phone number, address and the nearest police station to him
















it's fundamental not to overlay yourself with the ideas of others but learn to express yourself


originality is this synchronous rhythm with infinity and you in identity with yourself and it's rich and inexhaustible


repeating clichés is the most contemptible activity and speaks nothing but a contracted and painfully curtailed existance
















the group mind says  “ kill the spirit within you, don’t be an individual! ”
















it's sorta like someone enforcing a bleak day on themselves, cutting any life and joy out,


really really weird


endless endless grey



i noticed this comment as self-approriate  (thank-you for reminding me eileen : o )  when i wrote it which was a criticism of ted lemon on the hczb spouting about how creativity should take secondplace to subservience to the “teacher ”
















khru, the net is full of great art like escher, why not follow what you are interested in artistically and get more breadth ?


the real fiction of zen is you can oversimplify and get adequate understanding


you can't


it's all there on the web, research dogen if you like  ; o )


but the fiction is to just sit and listen to the teacher and you will get there


in reality you become calcified ignorance and the system self-perpetuates by then taking these zazen fossils and they become teachers in turn


nobody with any understanding would claim to teach !
















“ not one zen teacher ever acted superior and claimed to be awakened and better than others, like you are ”


i'm not a zen teacher, but the reluctant recipient of transmission from the sixth patriarch


well i wasn't that reluctant  : o )


as far as i can see i am the only one with an authentic understanding since the korean monk kusan sunim who died in 1983


yeah i am awakened, superior i don't buy, we all have a fundamental equality


but awakened is awakened and non awakened is nonawakened, what can i do, it's just the fact?
















the reason you are deluded is precisely what this exchange is showing, you just take everything shallowly and never go the extra mile to sorting anything out so it is real and just exist in a deluded and rather dull fantasy
















crap ted, the fake likes quiet and to be left alone to it’s own bullshit, you’re another person who could do some real life checking on what you spout !


ted stretch yourself and say something original?


i think it can actually hurt cause it means going outside our boundaries, but hey where is buddha if not outside the boundaries?
















let me say it again, the problem with translations is you are not reading what the author wrote or said, but some-one's opinion of what they wrote and in fact a lot of nuances are lost forever because they are so specific to the culture it was spoken or written in !


also with religious writings translators seem unable to let go their view of themselves as being the “true arbiters” of what is said and as a result the translations are heavily biased to certain interpretations !


the original trumps the clichéd !


for gods sake, be original and yourself and your own experience, how ever pitiful what you have to say may seem, it's still 100x better than regurgitating crap!


if you don't know something, then you don't know? whats the big deal? self honesty is where it starts !
















mark, you are not speaking from that space that comes from your own certainty, but relying on others flawed bullshit !


if you don’t know that yourself, what can i say?


if you are in touch with buddha he/she/it will give you your own original take and words and the half assed quotes around will seem what they are, bullshit !


reguritating pap is regurgitating pap, you can call that enlightenment or awakening but i don’t !
















  women spit an egg into their uteruses once a month and this determines most human behavior !
















life is purposeless and has no beginning or ending

the harmony of waves of a calm sea

breaking on the shore



this was in the asbestos ranges national park, ... on some sandhills looking at the sea in the morning .... i was just standing there looking and listening then i thought, well that's sorta sonorous cause the waves can really crash on this beach, but these were littles, just sorta percolating along
















life is purposeless and has no beginning or ending

the harmony of waves of a calm sea

breaking on the shore



this was in the asbestos ranges national park, i was on some sandhills looking at the sea in the morning .... just standing there looking and listening then i thought, well that's sorta sonorous cause the waves can really crash on this beach, but these were littles, just sorta percolating along
















life is purposeless and has no beginning or ending

the harmony of waves of a calm sea

breaking on the shore
















do women fib

is the sky blue

is the sky cloudy

do birds fly

do fish swim

do women fib



this is not anti-women, but some reference to the greater verbal plasticity they have. fib really means distortion and withholding or turning of information is part of that. i think men tend to withhold, while women are more adept at turning it.
















our mania gives rise to ourselves
and becoming like the sun
we depart


.
.
.
.
.
.


between heaven and sky who am i
between heaven and hell who is well
between sky and sea who is me
















donna williams' crazily bad  supplementation


she's really a fruit loop


well she has me banned from posting on her blog


i see it again and again, malign supplementation with over-reverence of medicine !


christ they get both wrong  : o )
















mark foote asks


andrew, what do you love?




my


reply



  lol, tank battles ?


i


feel


like


a

tiger


among


shermans


there's


too


many


of


you


i


am


not


going


to


win


the


war


am i?



i have alittle poem i wrote years ago up at cape  leveque  in northern western australia which is rather beautiful and has very high tides


strands of white beaches

ocean curls over the moon


death is the same as love
















boubi are you one of those free daist scumbags


you raping conning pure da free john bullshitter


not to mention herpes spreader : o)


find a good lay , yeah john taught you well didn't he?

christ da free john was wordy bull all the way to the bank and the law courts and you reject sense like what i am writing


your


eyes


are


full


of


sperm


!


jesus i hate you creeps with your tantric bullshit and creepy crawly sleaziness


  you so little believe in the possibilty of the absolute you think that sex is no obscuration !
















fred, look at some videos with jim harrison, he actually says something interesting


you don't say anything, just a sheep rattle, you just gotta step back and have areal look at the fact that you don't do any real work in this area so how can you expect to have any sort of interesting insights?


the hard fact is there is no solitude in a crowd, you need real solitude and substantial periods of it


i think suburban zen is the fiction that you can live with the wife, kids whatever and still get real insight


well


you


C


A


N


'


T


there's emptiness as an idea and emptiness as a fact and sadly or perhaps not sadly for most it remains an idea though they claim otherwise !


when you move into emptiness as a fact everything changes, there's huge energy and destructive and useful change and the blather of zen and advaita and christianity seems what it is, balther by slack no-nothing idiots


H


E


Y



T


H


I


S



I


S



T


H


E



W


O


R


L


D


!
















  mark,  why not step beyond what you “think” and do some actual research !


i think people like you read about three words in a bad translation and think, well that's it, i now have agood feel for dogen !


what exactly did he have to say and why not quote and discuss it, not be some spaced out acolyte who can't be bothered writing anything except his own fatuities?


i am sorry you have so little feeling for mountains that you can think aperson would move there for so called political reasons, whatever you imagine them to be, he was being given ahard time in kyoto by other priests, but that's about it


why not read the mountains and rivers sutra, what was he talking about?


you fucked up pumped up stupid would be priest  : o )
















what i have found reading dogen is most of his writing is rubbish, but occasionally you can actually work out what he was saying and it's the most amazing mysterious thing, it's like that poem of jim harrison's that is just below, you can read it and it makes sense


there's this whole industry around dogen as the deliberately obscure genius and that's how it's supposed to be with it's interpretors who are the translators and zen teachers and they know and you don't


but in fact it's the translations that are appallingly misguided and the voynich is swallowed whole by everybody


but the revelation is, when he is at his best and you can actually figure out what he was saying, it's just like that poem of jim harrison's, you can understand it !



Form in the woods; the beast,

a bobcat padding through red sumac,

the pheasant in brake or goldenrod

that he stalks – both rise to the flush,

the brief low flutter and catch in air;

and trees, rich green, the moving of boughs

and the separate leaf, yield

to conclusions they do not care about

or watch – the dead frayed bird,

the beautiful plumage,

the spoor of feathers

and slight, pink bones.




good  interview
















ersatz mysterion, yeah hunting competely changed my perspective too !


i don't shoot casually, i eat what i kill mostly and try for one shot kills, but all the same a barnes solid copper bullet (no lead in the carcass!) through an animal is a brutal business and tho people don't use guns on each other in normal life, that's basically how it is


vegetarianism, buddhism and religions generally try to create the illusion of some safe  “feel good”  space that one can exist in a blind comfort in but as brad warner is finding out with his health, it's just an illusion


interestingly the vegetarian sect hare krishna is known for it's high levels of domestic violence !


i honestly think that the chanting in hare krishna is a deliberately designed hypnotic drug to keep what is insane and so non-functional together


in a similar manner music is now used like that socially, the all pervasive synthetic media we are now immersed in !


fred, you are a woman btw, so you having sex is lesbian? was dogen a poof? likely given the zen track record for it  : o )


you guys live your suburban lives, pick up zen like it's some sort of sticky label and just plaster it over everything deliberately ignoring it was a supposedly abstinent and celibate tradition and completely crowd out any real work you might do in favour of sensual pleasures like sex and music where in reality a strong degree of abstinence is required to give real space for the sort of thought and work required


zazen is no substitute for abstinences and solitude !


there's no space sicker than this sort of bad suburban zen compromise that you live, but hey that's how it is usually implemented now !


you just need some time away by yourselves, none of you would write the way you do on this  board  with some proper solitude in natural beauty under your belts !


the retreats of that stupid christie mcnally bitch et al are not retreats, living with the boyfriend like that!


a couple of hours walk a week in an area of natural beauty rather than zazen and blathering on this board is what is needed, but hey, who wants to be real?


brad since you are going up to tassajara why not explore this ? you have obviously missed it to date !


why did dogen go and live in the mountains for god's sake?





fred replies:



dogen was the mountain; you are words





my reply



fred you put that sort of voynich reply between you and any real dealing !


you people who write about dogen like that don't know anything about him, have done no reading on him beyond the usual promulgated blather


he used to love being out in the natural enviroment and by the time he had died was becoming like basho and discarding the zen crap entirely


you wouldn't have spent even an hour researching him, let alone the man months required to get a real feel for him


fred if you know so much and are so enlightened why can't you manage more than what a retarded 17 year old would say?


where is your real experience of solitude and all that it brings?


not


there


is


it


and


you


can't


disguise


it


so


why


not


be


honest?

yeah


you


crazy


S


H


I


T
















music is someone else's illusion, writes over our own reality to our detriment !


the


efforts


we


go


to

to


avoid


being


alone


with


our


own


thoughts !





ed. reply  to
















A self portrait by two



In an attempt to paint,

a self portrait perfect,

I see her colors and fingerprints,

all over my canvas.



by  k balachandran




my


reply



 in the same way men build things women deconstruct and build men  : o )
















it's


as


natural


for

poets


to


be


injured


as


birds


to


fly


:


o


(


)
















it's


as


natural


for

poets


to


be


injured


as


birds


to


fly


:


o


(















it's


un-american


to


think


not


copy


and


be


original  !


it's


american


to


copy


rob


give


your


life


for


stupid


causes


and


be


very


very


wealthy


and


be


worshipped


because


of


that


wealth !




ed.  i guess one means human  : o )
















compared


to


adults


the


plasticity


of


children


is


just


amazing


:


o


)


(
















the biggest argument in favour of evolution is the retention of archaic features like the gills in mammal embryos that are redundant from an engineering point of view but necessary from the developmental genetic code structual  stability  point of view !
















“ there is more discrimination against men these days than there is against women ”


  absolute fucking crap !


  try an islamic culture !
















i think ted's comment about drinking a cup of tea being a miracle is one of the biggest all time wanking zen comments i have seen !


of course there is an awful lot of historical bullshit so i can't quite give it an all time historical high!


buddha and jesus are comic book characters and so are you !
















  krump , i was thinking that the almost complete absence of social concern in today's youth is it has been displaced by music, sorta turns it in on itself  : o )
















n f w



no


fucking


way


:


o


)
















nfw


no


fucking


way


:


o


)
















so all these people  “living in the moment”  are  schizophrenic  or alzheimery !


yeah


for


sure


those


fuckwits !


:


o


)


(
















keith, you god botherers amaze with your lack of knowledge of the christian mystic tradition which says that man disabled , injured and open is much closer to god than so called  “perfection ”


“god” is just a word, but whatever it means, closed and ignorant is not it  : o )





ed. reply to a comment  on
















regardless of anything else we are always under extreme evolutionary pressure from parasites and illnesses which forces sexual reproduction to get the necessary genetic  diversity!
















martin scholler, a  photographer  i actually  like !
















Is This A Haiku...Who Cares?



by Senor  Negativo


When you chain language

With antiquated constraints,

You have missed the point



my reply


exactly. imo haiku doesn't work in english except as vehicle for pretentious crap which it does admirably : o )
















a   natural ability  is you are already through the gate and over the hills before the others even think of starting  : o )
















we can all build skills, but success in life requires we be naturally good at it  : o (
















why no mention of the products?  is something being hidden?


( ed. graham mcgregors  “marketing”  bullshit  column )


ultimately people buy products for utility and not personal impress !


who wants to be burdened with constant personal contact!


i don't know why the herald is giving space to this sort of nonsense


(ed. mcgregor deleted my reply, iron spikes beneath the honeyed talk  : o )
















thank god there's no such thing as reincarnation, if you want to terrify me it's the prospect of having to go through being a teenage female, all that bonding and unbonding   murderous insanity  !
















thank god there's no such thing as reincarnation, if you want to terrify me it's the prospect of having to go through being a teenage female, all that bonding and unbonding nightmare of murderous insanity !
















thank god there's no such thing as reincarnation, if you want to terrify me it's the prospect of having to go through being a teenage female, all that bonding and unbonding nightmare  : o )














as you point out it's not simply some idea of what's socially appropriate but a willingless to trash herself and health to that ideal  : o (





ed. reply  to
















give


me


a


quiet


sea


the


gentle


dusk


and


moon


flecked


waters


over


a


woman


anyday


:


o


)


(





ed. reply  to
















give


me


a


quiet


sea


the


gentle


dusk


and


moon


flecked


water


over


a


woman


anyday


:


o


)


(
















i'm going to dissent and think you are talking absolute rubbish !


where clichés


are


truth


is


not !


i am sure as poet you might appreciate that “the , eternal, infinite ” is able to vest you with original thought if you choose to make yourself so intimate rather than the usual claims?


where


the


crowds


are


truth


is


not!


:


o


)


(





ed. reply  to
















not


looking


back


i


t


s




t


i


m



e


to


not


look


back !














eileen writes



the lake



It's surface

a perfect plane

reflecting the glow

of autumnal trees

on the shore

above

a cloudless sky

the wind blows

as frigid as the waters




my reply



wouldn't the wind ripple the surface?




eileen replies



Unless it was a breeze that sprung up after the observations...




my reply  !



it's surface, imperfect plane infused witha hidden light


glow the dull autumnal trees



a


b

o



v


e


t


h


e



s



h


o


r


e





ed. reply  to
















hello  poetry


so full


of


the


tender


honeyed


joyful


suicidal


sweet


flowery


dripping


honey


sentimental


too


puking


bring


back


N


A


S


T


Y!



scrape a hello poet and find saccharine !


modern life i guess, not a genuine thought or sentiment anywhere !


not even plagiarisim, just some sort of dull “sad sack” universe, not experienced or felt in the slightest part genuinely !


oh


how


they


ignore !
















i'm just mad about men, if only there was some-one special !


  quote  by marilyn munroe
















long marriages used to


be


unusual


simply


because


one


of


the


partners


died !





ed. reply  to
















from a certain point of view, things appear to b e distinct and not to occur again !


from


another


point of view things


 appear to not be distinct and occur again !
















from a certain point of view, things appear to b e distinct and not to occur again !


from


another


point of view things


appear to not be distinct and occur again !














brad warner  complains  to the 7th patriarch
















realised


men


are


not


realised


and


fornicate


with


ostriches


and


horses


and


tumble


around

and


go


up


and


down


and


only


enter


the


mountains


when


the


dirt


covers


their


bodies !!!!!!




bit of doggerel in response to some cripplingly badly translated dogen : o )



“ wise ones and sages have made the mountains their own chambers, their own body and mind. and through these wise ones and sages the mountains have been actualized.


however many great sages and wise ones we suppose have assembled in the mountains, ever since they entered the mountains no one has met a single one of them.


there is only the actualization of the life of the mountains; not a single trace of their having entered remains ”














through


contemplation


recursion


bites


back


and


O


P


E


N


S


UP


I


N


F


I


N


I


T


Y


:


o


)




the above is my retranslation of the two sentences below from the “self-fulfillment samadhi” section of dogen's bendōwa



“ therefore, this zazen person without fail drops off body and mind, cuts away previous tainted views and thoughts, awakens genuine buddha-dharma, universally helps the buddha work in each place, as numerous as atoms, where buddha-tathagatas teach and practice, and widely influences practitioners who are going beyond buddha, thereby vigorously exalting the dharma that goes beyond buddha.


at this time, because earth, grasses and trees, fences and walls, tiles and pebbles, all things in the dharma realm in ten directions, carry out buddha work, therefore everyone receives the benefit of wind and water movement caused by this functioning, and all are imperceptibly helped by the wondrous and incomprehensible influence of buddha to actualize the enlightenment at hand ”



( ed. from “the wholehearted way”, page 22, translation by shohaku okumura and daniel leighton )
















brad


warner


regarding


the


“ true


self  ”


let


me


take


a


knife


and run it from


the


chin


through


the


throat


and


down


the


neck


and


maybe


crack


open


the


ribs


with

a



bolt


cutter


then


run


the


knife


down


through


the

belly


and


out


through


the


balls


and


the


end


of


the


penis


and


let


all


that


putrid


crap


come


out!



ed.  gutted the umpteenth wallaby last night, a female in very good condition, cats had agood feed and i have the offal in the fridge, anyway after a while this sort of imagery gets quite vivid when you have done enough gutting  : o )



the diseased zen crap about  “true self ”  and the blathering from the psycho dogen gets my goat, but i was just looking at this  video  about the egyptian mummies and tombs and their underground palaces for the pharaoh to live in the afterlife and which is more crazy?



no answer to that one and that is how humans and animate life has always been, wants to continue in one form or another !














hczb  swan



  got better things to do than give life to those sickos !
















: o-!!!! )~


suckers !  : o )



ed.  last comment on the hczb, good riddance to abunch of sleezy leeches : o )
















your sentence structure and directness is very male!


humans are a gender blurred species


sexual orientation is only one part, you can get very gender mixed male and female heterosexuals





ed. reply  to
















“half a bee”  is actually a pretty good  example  of voynich !


the eric  skit














fred is not an entire waste of time, this  karmageddon  link he posted is very good


you cannot speak of  “understanding”  in terms of utility to the world, in fact it is usually the opposite tho for survival's sake you have to bridge some survival/non-survival no-man's land


in


fact


both


brad


warner


and


michael riggs/bhagavan dass


and


myself


all


do


that


but brad and michael have fallen short


in


that


they


miss


what


it's


really


about


just passing


the


time


pissing


into


a


urinal


both


of


them !
















with


words


one


can


create


any

sort


of


fake


reality


seen


it


time


and


time


again


the


speakers/


writers


have


no


interest


in


it


being


otherwise !


:


o


)


(
















with


words


one


can


create


any

sort


of


fake


realities


seen


it


time


and


time


again


the


speakers/


writers


have


no


interest


in


it


being


otherwise !


:


o


)


(














with


words


one


can


create


any

sort


of


fake


realities


seen


it


time


and


time


again


the


speakers/


writers


have


no


interest


in


it


being


otherwise !



mp3
















i'm


feeling


a


bit


better


because


i


couldn't


feel


any


worse


:


o


)


(




(ed. H3N2 flu july 2012 !)
















i'm


feeling


a


bit


better


because


i


couldn't


feel


any


worse


:


o


)
















when


you


are


not


distracted


by


people


infinity


emerges


:


o


)



mp3
















i have a migraine, teach me to write about health !


i


am


glad


to


hear

you

are


different


perhaps


:


o


)





ed. reply  to














idiots


revolving


in tiny


narrow


worlds


they


call


it


enlightenment  !


:


o


)


(
















idiots


revolving


in tiny


narrow


worlds


they


call


it


enlightenment !
















talk is cheap and of course with the internet x ten million !


:


o


)


(



mp3
















there's


a


quiet


satisfaction


in


an


involvement


ended


perhaps  ; o )





ed. reply  to
















always suppose


there's


nothing


to


see


and you


won't


be


disappointed


and


you


will


be


disappointed


:


o


)


(
















always suppose


there's


nothing


to


see


and you


won't


be


disappointed


and


you


will


be


disappointed



mp3 tbu
















  paul , well, i have read a poem or two of yours and i really like the mellifluous style, but on the other side they have no conceptual backbone, the sense is just a fragmented mess which actually is the norm for this board


i have advice on fish oil on my pages, it will help, but there are other things as well and i am not optimistic about what is happening with you, but we are designed to just breed and be disposed of which is the paradigm for most  : o )


too bad about the navy, i really think the vaccination schedules in the armed services are crucifying and half the problem with afghanistan and iraq is the way they cripple servicemen with too many vaccines given at once !


the other problem is getting involved in tribal wars that have been going on for thousands of years ; o )





ed. reply  to
















whole grains are a problem, especially wheat, the juices i have talked about, dairy is more complex, needs some sort of predigesting with enzymes or naturally digested like with cultured cheeses or yogurt


people like anything they agree with and if they are wrong in the first place? the proof of the pudding is writers block which is a symptom of an atrophying brain........


you can't handle what i am writing, that should wake you up to something ! : o )


the thing with health is right or wrong we bear the consequences, it only matters our ourselves and close family.......


in ten years you won't be able to deny..............





ed. reply  to
















actually i'd be flattered to be the most deluded person on this site, that would be some claim to fame  : o )





ed. reply  to
















your immune system may kick mine's arse but that's the profile for diabetes, osteoarthritis and any number of other over inflammatory conditions !


i'm not trying to be abrasive, but the reality is like your poetry, lacks something but you are capable of more


you are in the foothills of something that will rip your head off in 10 in 15 years


imo ; o )


the way you are eating is W R O N G, i just know from the effect and writing poetry displays a person very deeply : o )


B


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E


D



K


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V


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S



M


E


A


N



S


O


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H


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G!





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reality occurs the way it does


i


can't


say


more


:


o


)


(
















well life is full of claims, we can deny consequences but they still occur!


biofilm is a complex community of bacteria, viruses and fungi and what's in your gut and somewhat or very out of control for the people on this board!


actually the usa is now a nightmare of out of control viral, biofilm and developmental issues, in part from your abusive and unscientific vaccine program which is messes the natural immune system's control of the gut biofilm !


i'm a bit suspicious you are in the foothills of pre-diabetes because you don't seem to be very flexible or able to consider new ideas and the sad reality of diabetes is the brain gets slowly fried !


short attention span and somewhat flicky?


been there  ; o )


insomnia?  emily dickinson didn't sleep well and died at age 56 !


any culture that starbucks and macdonalds were born in deserves what it gets which is actually the worlds worst health!  : o )


(excepting gross protein shortage)


you are not replying to me because you don't have a problem !


bit of a no-brainer actually with anyone who writes : o )


i do have people who try to imitate my writing style, but i have yet to see one who manages it, sorta weak and like dishwater compared to my P U N C H !





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  “hello poetry”  poets are autistic, suicidal adhd retarded and deranged  : o )


oh and drug addicts and drunks?


that's the usual poetic profile of course : o )


it's the painful decay i can do without, an early sudden death does not seem to be on the cards : o )


if you are drinking a fruit juice for a rush you could already be pre diabetic


vege juices are not very digestible and create problems, rather than help


when i read what comes through hello potery everybody seems well below their neural potential


anyway i have some pages on the biofilm carbohydrate diet and supplement program


not


that


you


will


read


people


seem


incapable


of


leaving


their


disaster


course !


smooth


river


indeed !





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personally, i can't stop writing and think writers block is all to do with brain nutrition which is not a subject you seem to care about in the usa !


i can get good lamb brains here in australia, fish oil helps as well as a few other things like adequate sun on the skin and vitamin D!


but really a well nourished brain just floods the words  ; o )


lol, some men see the predator prey relationship in reverse, perhaps they see more truely ? .





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