this is work in progress or homilies or miscellaneous items

that don’t warrant a page by themselves

or seem to fit better here



pending poems  index



chronological order is from the bottom to the top of the page



audio files can be complemented by listening to them  with the eyes closed  !



with celibacy

it is apparent

how little  things add up  !

. .


o


(

ed.  when i wrote this i intended this to mean that things donʼt really add up, but now i can see it also puns in the sense of a number of  ‘small things’  adding up which is more the sense the three line spacing enforces compared to having all the words on one line !

as you get older

it becomes apparent

how little  things add up  !

. .


o


(

how little  things add up  !

. .


o


(

with celibacy

it is apparent

how little  things add up  !

ed.  when i wrote this i intended this to mean that things donʼt really add up, but now i can see it also puns in the sense of a number of  ‘small things’  adding up which is more the sense the three line spacing enforces compared to having all the words on one line !

as you get older

it becomes apparent

how little  things add up  !

how little  things add up  !

with celibacy

it is apparent

how little  things add up

ed.  when i wrote this i intended this to mean that things donʼt really add up, but now i can see it also puns in the sense of a number of  ‘small things’  adding up which is more the sense the three line spacing enforces compared to having all the words on one line !

as you get older

it becomes apparent

how little  things add up

how little  things add up

how little things add up

the problem with life is that giving attention to one thing excludes attention to another thing

the    other thing    always comes around to hit us

the problem with life is that giving attention to one thing excludes attention to another thing

the  “ other thing ”  always comes around to hit us

the problem with life is that giving attention to one thing excludes attention to another thing


i reply in this   thread

ALA is a chelator, and i've seen so many people permanently wrecked by it over the years the worst thing is they hang about on message boards  “selling”  how good it is . .

some dummkopf  spruiks  : o (

Any study behind the claim you make that NAC damages the brain, thyroid and kidneys ?  Maybe I just don't see it on the page.  All I've heard is that it's completely safe.  If you claim it's not then I'd like to see evidence or I call BS.  Genuinely curious

my

r e p l y

why don't you read the link page in full, there's links within that page to some studies and in fact the most prominent member of the  “pro chelation”  lobby, dr. andrew cutler who advocates the frequent ALA dose protocol says that large single daily dose ALA is extremely destructive, so obviously there is an issue !

 i've seen so many people permanently wrecked by it over the years 

call it bullshit like i didn't say that, take a daily dose of ALA and come back in five years and tell us how it went ?

 All I've heard is that it's completely safe 

isn't that the real bullshit, you are saying that medicine promotes chelation ?

this whole issue takes weeks of research, you don't read the linked page in full or follow through with web research  . .

your post lacks social and cognitive style skills ?

you need to understand the role of sulphur in body chemistry, its the  glue  of molecular reactions, its just the right stickiness .  .

the problem with mercury is that it bonds to sulphur better than anything else

alpha lipoic acid has two sulphur molecules in a claw like configuration, when it comes into contact with mercury or some other similarly attractive metals it moves it (mobilizes it)

so when you take ala ,  (or NAC !)  the mercury is moved around to make for new damage as rate reactions call it to fall off the ALA again . .

----------------------

ok, the OP was ALA, i didn't switch to NAC as per your post, but really its all just as applicable, NAC  (N-acetyl cysteine)  lacks the  claw structure  but still has a sulphur atom in it, so its a weaker mercury mobiliser

i see you have deleted your nick  .  .

----------------------

you need to understand what a  “chelator” and  “chelation” are

and that ALA is a chelator and NAC while not a chelator also mobilises mercury

and then you can research chelation and it won't take much of that to convince you of the real problem, that supplement manufacturers when they slip in quite high doses of these compounds into their multis are inducting people who take their products into a whole new world of very damaging chelation protocols

you won't find a lot of studies in this specific area because of a lack of funding though there is quite a bit of  science  available to those who put the leg work in

unfortunately this is not a  ‘tell me like i'm five’  topic which is why so many get so savagely burnt by these  “chelating” compounds i guess !

----------------------

you have to see there is such a thing as  “chelation”  and what these very potent heavy metal mobilizing compounds do and then realise that some of these compounds can be malignly put into multi's, that should get you asking questions !

when i look at the thoughts that re-occur with me i seem to be made of  3/4ʼs  junk  !

when i look at the thoughts that re-occur with me i seem to be made of three quarters junk  !

when i look at the thoughts that re-occur with me i seem to be made of  3/4ʼs  junk  !

when i look at the thoughts that re-occur with me i seem to be made of three quarters junk  !

when i look at the thoughts that re-occur with me i seem to be made of  3/4ʼs  junk

when i look at the thoughts that re-occur with me i seem to be made of three quarters junk


“ my babe lies cold within  in my arms but none will let me in ”

bernadette crawley   singing   ‘ the lass of aughrim ’

i found this because the song is used in james joycesʼs short story   I   II   ‘ the dead ’ ,  i had to listen several times to  “ get it ” ,  really captures and is captured by the meaning of the story . .

‘ led  astray  by our feelings ’

a hardened cynic

!

: o )

‘ led astray by our feelings ’

led astray by our feelings

  what would happen to society, if all organized religion was instantaneously eradicated  ?

serious replies only  

it has happened before, communist russia and china

its difficult to reason out, but historically state atheism is a disaster area for the general populace !

i think the species is naturally so murderous that societies need some sort of learned break on those behaviors !

the reason a dimly lit night sky has a  bluish cast  is that the blue cones still have a base line firing rate so its not that the dimly lit sky has a bluish tinge, but that the blue cones donʼt turn entirely off !

the problem is  the problem is

one problem is

another problem is  . .

the problem is  the problem is

one problem is

another problem is

the problem is, the problem is

one problem is

another problem is

lol, a very  “ surprised by time ”  painting for sure, an    intensification  of real life  !  : o )

highly modified too according to some recent research i read, lots of paintings over  !

the problem young people have these days is there is so much easy entertainment and they just get lost in it !

actually i think karl ove knausgaard suffered from his  obsession  with rock music, put him years behind !

the problem young people have these days is there is so much easy entertainment and they just get lost in it !

i have a solaray product which provides 200 micrograms of chromium as  “ GTF chromium yeast ”

is this pro-oxidative and potentially damaging to DNA, or is this a useful supplement to take weekly / daily ?

jarrow lists chromium GTF under their mitochondrial support page

my

r e p l y

i think the latest research shows that just about any form of chromium is pro-oxidative

i personally put about 50 to 100 micrograms of that same chromium gtf yeast you mention in cooling food or a sauce daily so that you get it to dwell at a pasteurizing temperature of about 70C/158F even though the supplement yeast is   “ pre killed ”

yes, eating is genocide ! :o)

it definitely reduces insulin resistance and blood sugar, donʼt forget that high blood sugar is a murderously glycating/oxidising event !

so its a question of the right dose imo !

its important to understand that taking vitamins is not like food, there's definite ranges and too much and too little. .

chromium GTF along with mk7 (k2) would have to be two of the most useful !

a monk asked  :  it is said that a clear-eyed person sees all.  does he see form ?

joshu replied  :  break it into pieces

the monk asked  :  how should one break it ?

joshu replied  :  if you use force, it will fly back into your face

my

re-translation

joshu replied  :  anaylse it !

the monk replied :  how do you do that ?

joshu replied  :  how do you analyse then ?

if men could see women clearly ,  they wouldnʼt be men

if men could see women clearly  they wouldnʼt be men

if men could see women clearly  ,  they wouldnʼt be men

if men could see women clearly they wouldnʼt be men

if men could see they wouldnʼt be men

jon, re supps you really want to discuss what you are doing more, target specific problems like sleep rather than go broad brush, some supplements may not meet your needs, like for instance i recently dropped magnesium taurate, donʼt seem to need it any more perhaps because i am eating a lot of apples  and the mk7  (k2)  works wonders for the cardiovascular system ?

iʼm pretty gullible so have got burnt by people over the years and am much more cautious now . .

people just will not show you the same consideration as you show them so now i am careful to extract my pound of flesh, like with sepehr he makes me think and gives material for writing . .

what i have figured is the less i have to do with people the better . .

sepehr, the mani in your play is not the mani my research indicates to me and i find the real life mani and his own words instructive whereas your play in my view is ideologically agenda driven and distorting

‘ murder in the cathederal ’  has a similar issue, plays featuring historical figures of necessity have a problem with the conflict between the audiences own knowledge of the historical figure and the playwrightʼs ideology and presentation of it

to me what is amazing is that with a reasonable amount of reading and   research    on the web ,  one can form a reasonable picture of a figure as historically, culturally removed and obscure as mani !

what does husband and wife mean ?

enemies  for  l i f e ?

what does husband and wife mean ?

enemies for l i f e ?

what does husband and wife mean ?

enemy for l i f e ?

what does husband and wife mean ?

enemy for life ?

a marvellous newly   discovered  caravaggio

notice the contrast in the faces of judith and her maid

holofernes of course meets the usual male fate !

2016   17  18  19  .  .  48

my politics are tempered by a fatalism about human incompetence, good empires are followed by bad and bad occasionally by good  !

my politics are tempered by a fatalism about human incompetence, good empires are followed by bad and bad occasionally by good

reddit zen

turning in endless circles

dumbnut

burbles

canʼt

jump

any hurdles !

reddit zen, turning in endless circles

dumbnut burbles  canʼt jump

any hurdles !

reddit zen, turning in endless circles

dumbnut burbles  canʼt jump  any hurdles  !

i don't suppose women can help being women

i don't suppose women can help being women  !

. .


o


(

i donʼt suppose women can help being women

i donʼt suppose women can help being women  !

i donʼt suppose women can help being women  !  : o (

audio


thereʼs a subtlety to tolstoy that distinguishes the really great writers, i never clicked to the    scene  where count bezukhov threatens to kill his wife (hélène) before, but having seen more of how the female works i can now understand it !

basically she indirectly attempted to murder him though the proxy of her lover who had a reputation as a successful duellist deliberately provoking bezukhov to challenge a duel . .

now the benefit to the lovers was that she would no doubt get a substantial inheritance from one of the wealthiest estates in russia and they would be able to live together in well heeled bliss !

so its a literal attempt to murder and when it went wrong for them and this is another subtlety that shows that tolstoy really understood the duelling game  (since bezukhov was a big man he would be able to hold a pistol securely and fire with good accuracy) ,  his wife then mounts a verbal barrage with the intent to confuse bezukhov as to what had really happened . .

its just all a beautiful subtle undercurrent sweeping along without anything being too explicit and indeed this mirrors the way humans work since rarely do they have a true perception of their and others motives . .

nor is a wife and husband wanting each other dead that strange as its not in real life either !

----------------------

aleksandr pushkin got killed in his duel of course, well thatʼs the real world  !  : o(

“ do you use heavy cream when eating fruits  ?  like the cream put into coffee  ? ”

i make a sort of a sauce with a desert spoon or two of cabernet sauvignon, some double/heavy cream and maybe a couple of desertspoons of a homemade jam and maybe a bit of yogurt, heat that up to about 75C to pasteurize it and as it cools to about 70C ,  put in a bit of chromium yeast to pasteurize it, and then wait until it cools further for use !

jam has sugar in, so caution with amounts !

when i read sapphoʼs poems am i sappho ?

to some extent, yes !

: o )

when i read sapphoʼs poems am i sappho ?

to some extent, yes !

when i read sapphoʼs poems am i sappho ?

to some extent, yes

when i read sapphoʼs poems am i sappho ?

when i read sapphoʼs poems am i sappho

the thing about war and peace is its only partly   imaginary ,  its also the world of leo tolstoyʼs life

same with sir henry nevilleʼs plays !

what is meaning ,  what is meaningful ?

what is meaningless ?

what is meaning, what is meaningful ?

what is meaningless ?

what is meaning, what is meaningful ?

  however certain our expectations the moment forseen may be unexpected when it   arrives   

from   ‘ murder in the cathederal ’  by  t.s.  eliot

if you are travelling to south america, iʼd wait until a zika vaccine comes out and you also need watch for malaria and chagas

also the people are geneticially ultraviolent, i think you would hit trouble if you attract that sort of thing, mayans are murderous !

----------------------

you should always have back up money travelling in places life is cheap

one of the half starved monks at joshuʼs  “ temple ”  asked joshu

i seem to be showing some promise or aptitude for this  “ work ”  and it makes me feel abit smug or superior to the others !

what should i do with that

joshu answered, why do you have to do anything with that ?

iʼm not a theist

iʼm not an atheist

iʼm

N O T

an

i

iʼm not a theist

iʼm not an atheist

iʼm

NOT

an

I

iʼm not a theist

iʼm not an atheist

iʼm

not

an

i

iʼm an atheist

iʼm a theist

iʼm

an

i

iʼm not an atheist

iʼm not a theist

iʼm

an

i

iʼm not an atheist

iʼm not a theist

iʼm

NOT

an

i

iʼm not an atheist

iʼm not a theist

iʼm

not

an

i

“ prajna ”  removed the comment i posted about me misreading   the title  as  ‘  all is Hell ’  and me thinking, well she has got that right !

my reply

you removed my comment  ?  wasnʼt it well  ?

its not a bad talk, you donʼt need to be so sensitive !

you just want to roll with waves with the comments, one flows into and from another, so what if the road is covered in blood or is that the advantage of it ?

i actually found your video quite helpful, 13 views figures ! : o)(

----------------------

‘ prajna ʼ  ginty doing a muscle development and co-ordination  therapy  with her daughter ,  libby !

that second video sobered me up !

----------------------

i think what sheʼs saying in the first video that i relate to is the notion of sufficiency in   ‘ resting ’  or being in oneself . .

i tend to be a person always c h a s i n g  t h in g s . .

really one has arrived and knows what it is about and it doesnʼt go much further than the following of that knowledge and its practical implications . .

god the thought of writing forever more as per the   charles bukowski curse   is frightening and depressing . .  ! : o(

 the scars of a wound that have healed so many times only to open and   bleed  again

the past has ginormous stomach that eats away everything 

jason   w r i t e s

gutted some piglets that either didn't make it through birth or the cold night, got plenty of organs, about 4 thyroids, missed one or two when i mixed it up with the larynx, immediately knew when i took the larynx that it was too late to get the thyroids

ate 3 thyroids cooked and didn't notice much of an effect, later ate one raw and about an hour and a half later i got pretty warm, flushed cheeks

also could've been the higher dose of vitamin E i took 300 iu

my

r e p l y

vitamin E has never made me warm or given me flushed cheeks !

the flushed cheeks response indicates to me you have a thyroid problem and maybe impaired circulation as a function of low thyroid ! !

you can put the raw thyroids in about 70C/158F water and leave for five minutes, that might still preserve the thyroid action and kill any toxoplasmosis etc !

it's really weird, you might be the only person in the usa to have eaten a foetal pig raw thyroid for 50 years, people eating dessicated pig thyroid would be aghast at your primitiveness !

i like to horrify my relatives with tales of eating possum and wallaby organs !

----------------------

jason notes several days later

tyromax arrived today, took some in the morning and my hands and feet warmed up, same with cheeks, not as much as the foetal pig thyroid though

life is repetitive similarity    life is repetitive similarity !     life is repetitive similarity  ! : o ( : o( : o) : o( : o( : o )

life is repetitive similarity !     life is repetitive similarity  ! : o ( : o( : o) : o( : o( : o )

life is repetitive similarity  ! : o ( : o( : o) : o( : o( : o )

life is repetitive similarity

v2

thatʼs life, just repetitive similarity

v1

he is better than him ,  she is better than he  a flea is better than her !

. .


o


(


)

he is better than him ,  she is better than he  a flea is better than her !

: o ( )

he is better than him ,  she is better than he  a flea is better than her !

: o ) (

he is better than him ,  she is better than he  a flea is better than her !

: o )

he is better than him ,  she is better than he  a flea is better than her !

he is better than him ,  she is better than he  a flea is better than her

anybody can hassle some-one else off a web forum because they don't like what they say

however the real life skill is tolerating what we don't like and looking more closely at it to extract the validity !

a million billon words on the web, how many are actually useful to us or do we make use of ?

so i'm starting to get hassled on reddit supplements because they don't like what i am saying

see i can contribute and help build the forum up and make it more effective, but in the end the moderators and others still treat me like shit so just walk away and don't help build it up, let them roil in their maladaptive taking of supplements stupid bastards, . .  jeezz so much of life is like this !

like reddit zen, princesses with their brains leaking out of their ears and eyes saying everything is ok . .

----------------------

supplements are very difficult, the majority of people damage their health rather than are helped

you don't want to know

easy to pretend on reddit and people do

i'm voting with my feet, good bye ! :o)

i have seen it so many times before, these sick puppies who make an absolute hash of their supplementation overwhelm the messageboard with their bad advice

even if the board starts out right, the board gets a reputation and then all the sick pups flood in to take advantage of it

----------------------

the problem is that really the more successful these boards become the more they attract the huge number of wrong minded quite ill people of whom there are millions on the net and on the computer all day

its just a question of time before they dominate and ruin a health message board, i have seen this happen so many times . .

i've been through it all before, but one sort of forgets . .

supps and diet that   work

unfortunately you cannot help people through public health message boards because of the above mentioned problem

australia and new zealand are very unusual in having no prion disease

the problem is that heat doesn't kill prions

sepehr, i think what is special about a play is   it creates  a world that can only exist in that play, does the writing create a world worthy of that ?

how far does posturing get you in life   ? 

how far does posturing get you in life  ?

how far does posturing get you in life ?

how far does posturing get you in life

you have the wrong model of the way the gut works, the dated conventional medical view which is that basically we have tubes that mix enzymes from the pancreas with food

while that is true we are also hosts to a very unstable malign/beneficial microbiome that produces all sorts of toxins and signalling compounds that have a profound effect on our bodies and we have to be very careful of not feeding it in a way that tips the balance from beneficial/neutral to malign

you know  “ donʼt ask fat people how to lose weight ”  but actually most fat people donʼt ask anyone else, you can tell them sense but they donʼt listen !

its quite depressing looking at william blake who didnʼt have the wherewithal for his own funeral

but he had a formative influence on any number of artists who were commercially successful . .

william blakeʼs illustrations of thomas greyʼs poems, lost for many years until recovered in the demolition of hamilton palace, extraordinary !

I           II   

i quite like this  one

a s k  on reddit

thereʼs a lot of research saying that concussion is a huge issue in college football, do you feel that is a problem ?

the college football player  replies

yeah its pretty massive

i have friends who have had probably like 6 or 7 self-diagnosed concussions, but only 1-2 reported

its not good

everybody gets knocked, and if you donʼt get concussed on single hits, getting hit hundreds of times day after day causes even worse damage

cot-case  ! : o(

an  askreddit  reply  by   ksiyoto

The feelings you'll get  —

When your baby first reacts to your funny faces

When the youngster greets you in the morning standing up inside the crib, holding onto the side, bouncing up and down at the knees because they are excited to see you.

When the 2 year is looking tired in the evening, playing on the floor, all the sudden looks around, crawls up on you, puts their head on your shoulder, and goes to sleep.

When the whimpering stops after you bandaged up another knee.

When your 8 year old daughter, on the double tube waterslide, goes "Wheeee! Wheeeeeee!", you'll just sit in the back with a grin and enjoy it.

When your 12 year comes within a whisker of winning first prize for showmanship in the rabbit competition at the county fair on her first try.

When you see them having so much fun with their friends in a band.

That awful day in August, when you drive them off to college, and you know they will no longer be around much anymore.

That lump in your throat when their name is announced as they cross the stage to get their degree.

That moment when you realize some other man has captured your little girl's heart.

It's all a great feeling.

i find doctors sort of  “anti”  anything that requires finesse or is subtle and they make so much money they are only ever just between holidays . .

i really would not drink unpasteurized raw milk, a minute at 70C/158F should be ok

i gave myself a thyroid boost today by painting my toes with betadine sore throat gargle iodine, worked quite well but i really think that cooked thyroids also have something needed in them !

----------------------

thiroyd  sounds ok

they canʼt  “ cook ”  thyroids or the hormone gets damaged so i don't know about whether animal sourced thyroid hormone is a disease risk

i didnʼt sleep much last night because of the iodine i put on my toes and i definitely felt warmer than i usually do

so basically i get by with occasional iodine use and eating cooked or lightly cooked thyroids

its a useful skill to be able to identify thyroids in an animal, they are sorta grainy or nodular, deer will have them, i guess you have to watch out for ticks . .

if i write

let

me

unwrite

if   i   write  let   me  unwrite


if i  write

let

me

unwrite

if i  write

let

me

u

n

w

r

i

t

e

if i write let me unwrite

we  pontificate

about  something

but

really

its

nothing

pontificate

on

we  pontificate

about  something

but

really

its

nothing

pontificate

on

we pour away our lives and energy today and for what ?

today becomes  obsolete  tomorrow  and so on

and  so on  and                            

so

on

!

we pour away our lives and energy today and for what ?

today becomes  obsolete  tomorrow  and so on

and  so on  and

so

on

!

we pour away our lives and energy today and for what ?

today becomes  obsolete  tomorrow  and so on

and  so on  and

so

on

!

when you look at  hannibal ,  he fought successfully against overwhelming odds, but he was always overextended and thus victories always collapsed through this, ultimately unsuccessful and took poison to avoid being handed over to the romans !

the root problem was the carthaginians were completely overtaken by the romans as a naval power, the romans started behind, but their engineering prowess and empire size mean the end of hegemony for the carthaginians, if they had been able to take a strategic view then quiet integration into the roman empire was the way to go, but the nature of human is groups in power only ever give it up by forcible relinquishment !

when you look at  hannibal ,  he fought successfully against overwhelming odds, but he was always overextended and thus victories always collapsed through this, ultimately unsuccessful and took poison to avoid being handed over to the romans !

mani retorts to kirbir in sepehrʼs new play

i damn all gods and prophets except the solace of oblivion and the alignment of stars into spectral infinity

sepehr, having  read  some mani i really donʼt relate to what you write in your play overall, sorta pseudo ligotti, thatʼs your choice,  . .

you need to find your own audience, to continue correspondence with me will be unhealthy for you, you will find me too negative, we donʼt agree and you are not interested in 7th patriarch zen, go your own way . .

this is one of the traps of hanging out on the hardcore zen blog or reddit zen, they are so hostile and negative you can grow to thinking its normal, but its not

where you disagree fundamentally the way should part . .

its not war its just each making their own way in life . .

people with no real life experience of zen never understand the master/student dynamic of approval, you are not experienced in the culture and donʼt understand seniority . .

i have said before we are not friends . .  whats the basis of dealing with each other ?

me extracting writing material and observations and you gaining useful feedback which you ignore ?

you have clearly plumbed for a ligotti type horror perspective and i without the slightest shadow of doubt reject that as a dead end !

what more can i say ?

----------------------

in terms of my reading of your play, at this point we are running into clear fundamental differences of viewpoint

perhaps that is what you play has to say . .

like kartir the context means i can only crucify . .

----------------------

the joke is that both mani and kirtir were both pursuing illusory nonsense, rather like the jews taking moses as their founding father when he is a make-over of dionysus !

with religion the bullshit is so thick you canʼt stir it and that will never change !  : o)

in a sense the play is true because its about brutality and death over mindless, yet throughly believed nonsense, perhaps thatʼs why you relate to mani and kirtir ?

----------------------

incidentally maniʼs division of society into the  “elect”  and  “hearers”  worked very well where a lot of slaves were owned as in the culture he was in !

you can see manichaeism as a slave owning doctrine which was why it was so appealing to the upper classes

that was his mistake with bahrman, he had previously been successful with his appeals to the ruling class, mani was obviously a person of some charisma and his doctrine was socially stabilizing from their point of view, but in fact kirbir was effectively the new ruler !

at this point i would say your rewrites are working, there could be quite a while before you are ready to say its finished !

what really helps is tons and tons of research, you can continually draw on that to finesse the needed subtleties and human interest !

there are some good lines, at your best you write very well . . .

you  (ed.  a reddit meditation post)  need quality reading, the hoi polloi just have more misguidance !

neitzsche and schopenhaeur say for instance life is intrinsically unhappy !

you  (ed.  a reddit meditation post)  need quality reading, the hoi polloi just have more misguidance !

neitzsche and schopenhaeur say for instance say life is intrinsically unhappy !

you  (ed.  a reddit meditation post)  need quality reading, the hoi polloi just have more misguidance !

you need quality reading, the hoi polloi just have more misguidance !

emily dickinson’s coconut  cake

white clouds, infinity coalescing

red leaves  :  infinity leaving

white clouds, red leaves

brushing in and out

of reality

white clouds, infinity coalescing

red leaves  :  infinity leaving

white clouds, red leaves

brushing in and out of

reality

its hard to get used to the  “ also rans ”  the web throws up, a streak of a very strong talent that will never be matched by the areas of weakness being brought up to strength !

i have always noticed a certain humility with the truely talented and i think this is a/the key, talent needs working on the weak areas and you first have to admit they exist, the “also rans” are frustratingly unable to see themselves outside their talents and so languish in obscurity !

its hard to get used to the  “also rans”  the web throws up, a streak of a very strong talent that will never be matched by the areas of weakness being brought up to strength !

its hard to get used to the  “ also rans ”  the web throws up, a streak of a very strong talent that will never be matched by the areas of weakness being brought up to strength !

thomas ligotti is a poor  plagiarist  of edgar allen poe

how true it is that so little talent abounds

endless stupids regurgitating crud and applaused for it

such

is

the

nature

of

the

world !

the reddit zen drug  thread ,  the underlying reality . .

crude damaged morons braying to each other . .

no wonder they are all so rigid and completely unable to take anything on board, their loyalty is to substances

easy to bullshit endlessly on reddit, little tar babies every one ! : o(

ill, thereʼs no comfort even lying on a bed !

ill, thereʼs no comfort even lying on a bed

ill, thereʼs no comfort even lying in a bed !

ill, thereʼs no comfort even lying in a bed

it fell into the room with a curved base

it fell into the room with a curved boat

we talk to each other ,  we talk at each other, what do we say ?

nothing

we talk at each other, we talk to each other ,  what do we say ?

nothing

life is a savage daydream !

. .


o


(


)

life is a savage daydream !

. .


o


(

life is a savage daydream !

: o ( )

life is a savage daydream !

: o (

life is a savage daydream !

life is a savage daydream

the  authors  wrote that compared to one cigarette, one waterpipe session exposes the smoker to

2 to 4 times the amount of nicotine

7 to 11 times the amount of carbon monoxide

100 times more tar

17 times the amount of formaldehyde

2 to 5 times the amount of high molecular weight carcinogenic polyaromatic hydrocarbons and

3 times the amount of phenol

sounds like a step forward doesnʼt it !


either a   ‘ not too great ’  poem by kodojin    I  II    and/or a shockingly bad translation

white clouds  :  void is form

red leaves  :  form is void

white clouds and red leaves  —

all swept away by an eveningʼs wind

my

r e p l y

white clouds, infinity coalescing

red leaves  :  infinity leaving

white clouds, red leaves

brushed in and out of

reality

the net is full of   complacent   mutually validating morons.

they have an audience, but thatʼs all they have   ͟     ͟    !

one reader with some discernement and originality is worth way more than the aforementioned stinking mass !

the net is full of complacent mutually validating morons.

they have an audience, but thatʼs all they have   ͟     ͟    !

one reader with some discernement and originality is worth way more than the aforementioned stinking mass !

the net is full of mutually validating morons.

they have an audience, but thatʼs all they have   ͟     ͟    !

one reader with some discernement and originality is worth way more than the aforementioned stinking mass !


life is just an endlessly repetitive   d y d r e   !

life is just an endlessly repetitive d a y d r e a m  !

life is just an endlessly repetitive d a y d r e a m

life is just an endlessly repetitive daydream

any supplements for mindfulness ?

are there any supplements which help you quiet your mind and focus on sensations in your body ?

iʼve been trying to do mindfulness unaided, and itʼs just not working

my

r e p l y

thereʼs a nasty recurve of subsets and supersets with notions of self, meditation, mind, conciousness, unconciousness . .

you need to read adequately or the  “mind”  just grinds itself into more bullshit which is the usual state of affairs . .

as for supplements, a quality krill oil helps with neural plasticity . .

people are a nightmare  !

:  o  (

people are a nightmare  !

: o (

people are a nightmare  !

people are a nightmare

manichaeism  was an extraordinary achievement, within two hundred years of its founders death it spanned from china to britain  . .

a rather bizarre patchwork of christianity, zorastiasm, hinduism and buddhism, he must have been a genius at sticking together that combination that didnʼt strain old beliefs too much, but offered the interest and variety of new proxies fitting somewhat onto old ones !

the sheer scope and spread of manichaeism was absolutely remarkable and its only the ruthlessness of its suppression that leaves so little information about it today !

another interesting thing is its founder was a real historical person, easily verified, that’s what an actual historical person looks like and his fate is about the only one possible in the circumstances !

interestingly there are stone relief carvings of kartir, the zoroastrian high priest who was responsible for maniʼs imprisonment, a merciless muscular thug from his image for sure !

every now and then some-one posts on reddit askdocs or medical with serious and not so serious concussion

from sports or being   jumped 

they all seem to expect thereʼs some quick fix that can be done and donʼt understand the system turning them away

they donʼt get any good advice either

here is the good advice

youʼve had some brain damage, not much can be done, take one to several months off if you can and then take it real easy for a year

taking some quality krill oil will help the repair

completely avoid any blows to the head for the rest of your life

the point of mysticism is the personal knowledge of god

of course the way most people approach this is to build barriers to completely remove that possibility !

the point of mysticism is the personal knowledge of god

my rule with alcohol is no more than a half to 3/4ʼs of a standard glass a day !

i was too accommodating !

when you are being  ‘ given the bird ’ ,  feel it !

i was too accommodating !

when you are  ‘ given the bird ’ ,  feel it !

i was too accommodating !

i was too accommodating

friends are not the be all and end all, one needs to   prioritize  oneself  !

friends are not the be all and end all, one needs to prioritize oneself

treesho  w r i t e s

 iʼm a sack of flesh waiting to finally   expire  and be done with this world where clearly i canʼt cope and donʼt belong 

my

r e p l y

everybody is a stranger to themselves and life, most never see it though !

treeshoʼs  r e p l y

not even sure what this means lol.

my

r e p l y

‘ i've tried to kill myself at least four times ’

lol, you should know then !

basically its the mystical viewpoint, life is some corpse that dresses it self up with attractive scents and flowers !

some of us get to see it without the scents and flowers !

treeshoʼs  r e p l y

ah fair enough and sounds about right.

my

r e p l y

you need a bit of solitude every day, a walk or just being by yourself and not doing anything . . a lifetime's work of understanding speaking from experience . .

everybody is a stranger to themselves and life, most never see it though !

everybody is a stranger to themselves and life, most never see it though

mani got into a very fucked up space, doomed by his own popularity and the success of his religion, the brutality of his death and those of his followers was entirely intentional and intended as what it was, a super effective deterrent !

what stuck me about him is at age 58 he was cruelly killed

obviously naive

basically  (ed.  writing a play)  its like writing poetry, it needs to come from intense involvement, let it sorta be its own voice, you have to follow that and not impose preconceived schema

you need to have created/create some interesting new world that flows along under its own impetus

if the play is based on history, then the way you use knowledge of how things turned out historically (projecting into the future from within the play) requires caution !

since its a partly imaginary world then the future for it must be partly imaginary too !

‘ what is zen ’

what is what ?

unfortunately the only good multi i have ever found is the blackmores  ‘ mega b complex ’  which i cut down and that only covers the B vitmains

as for the rest it depends on what problems you are trying to solve and you have to supplement individual nutrients  !

a good play is when it takes on a life of its own and the reader/viewer falls into its internal consistency  !

: o )

a good play is when it takes on a life of its own and the reader/viewer falls into its internal consistency  !

a good play is when it takes on a life of its own and the reader/viewer falls into its internal consistency !

a good play is when it takes on a life of its own and the reader/viewer falls into its internal consistency

i am special

i

donʼt

know

am

i

special ?

i am special

i donʼt know

am i special ?

an elderly male relative has just had a successful operation to straighten out a bit of the small intestine by removing a band adhesion, it was interesting that despite a scan they couldnʼt tell what the problem was  ( they guessed it wrong as a portal vein thrombosis and circulation obstruction to the small bowel )

they had to do a laparoscopic inspection to see and then the next step was obvivous

in the old days once they cut into you, you had only a 50% chance of surviving, these not such big deal operations are adding another twenty years to our lives !

 if you  fight  with body armor and helmet and corselet, you need daily training or you can’t move

that’s why, for example, the biblical david  —  a shepherd  —  refused to don a suit of armor and bronze helmet before fighting goliath 

all things are a manifestation of the buddha dharma

there is the manifestation that is the manifestation of itself

its this simple   ͟     ͟     ͟

the endless idiots

donʼt

know !

all things are a manifestation of the buddha dharma

there is the manifestation that is the manifestation of itself

its this simple   ͟     ͟     ͟


all things are a manifestation of infinity

there is the manifestation that is the manifestation of itself

its this simple   ͟     ͟     ͟

the endless idiots

donʼt

know !


watching the sunset

sitting on the breakwater

the sun has set

all that is left

are black ellipses

wobbling on the water

watching the sunset

sitting on the breakwater

the sun has set

all that is left are black ellipses

on the water

watching the sunset

sitting on the breakwater

the sun has set

all that is left are black streaks

on the water

watching the sunset

sitting on the breakwater

the sun has set

all that is left is black streaks

on the water

what is this ?

it exists for a while and then is gone


what is this ?

it exists for a while and is gone

what is this ?  it exists for a while and then is gone

what is this ?  it exists for a while and is gone

i was thinking i am quite comfortable here in tasmania and fit in with the people being so autistic, however  the truth of the matter is i am a stranger wherever i go  !

i was thinking i am quite comfortable here in tasmania and fit in with the people being so autistic, the truth of the matter is i am a stranger wherever i go  !

the truth of the matter is i am a stranger   wherever i go   !

the truth of the matter is i am a stranger wherever i go  !

the truth of the matter is i am a stranger wherever i go


poetry works by cross referencing clusters of associations rather than limited highly demarcated and exculsionary definitions

poetry works by clusters of associations rather than limited highly demarcated and exculsionary definitions

when they sleep with somebody else, thatʼs a wall, donʼt cross or try to scale it, you donʼt have to and its way less angst !

in some cases its a get out of jail free card  —  take it !

when they sleep with somebody else, thatʼs a wall, donʼt cross or try to scale it, you donʼt have to and its way less angst !

a monk asked joshu

what about when the four mountains close in on each other

ed.  supposedly birth, sickness old age and death

joshu replied

there are no signs of escape

my

reply

they donʼt close in on each other

quite pertinent  research  on depression and  “ overactivation ”  of the default mode network

the fact is once you get into meditation and contemplation the default mode network runs riot . .

well you can take lsd apparently !

but in terms of true contemplative or meditative work, thatʼs not the way to go, basically quality reading and experential working out gives substance for hyperactivity of the  DMN  to work on !

in that operation the understanding is transformed

but almost universally i see the combination of dead head reading and insufficient solitude create the various idiocies the net is so replete in . .

zombies chewing their own fingers thinking its brains

w

h

a

t

c

a

n

y

o

u

d

o

?

my rewriting of number  396  from  ‘ the recorded sayings of zen master joshu ’  translated  by  james  green 

a monk asked joshu

how do we live in accordance with infinity ?

joshu replied, face what you dislike !

the monk replied

what if i sorta glide off that ?

joshu replied

well you are going to stick to conventional values

to do this stuff properly breaks you, voids your gut and crimples your back . .

the world is full  of  artsy-fartsy  p r e t e n d e r s . .

the possibility that shakespeare wrote  ‘ as you like it ’  absolutely boggles the mind  !

its sir henry neville all over !

the possibility that shakespeare wrote  ‘ as you like it ’  absolutely boggles the mind !

its sir henry neville all over

the possibility that shakespeare wrote  ‘ as you like it ’  absolutely boggles the mind

its sir henry neville all over

people spend their lives defending viewpoints rather than examining where abandoning that viewpoint would take them !

people spend their lives defending viewpoints rather than examining where abandoning that viewpoint would take them

40  is not too young to have arteries sufficiently stiff to  damage  the brain

 the study found that, among young healthy adults, higher aortic  stiffness  was associated with reduced white matter volume and decreased integrity of the gray matter, and in ages much younger than previously described ”

this  is very clever, james veitch is inducting the same suspension of disbelief that the prospect of a large windfall gain causes in the target of the scammer !

duper or duped  ?  the prospect of easy money fools us all    ̲    ̲    ̲ 

and the actual easy money we can walk past through ignorance and limited views !

----------------------

an induction stove element  “ induces ”  heating eddy currents in a pot !

an induction stove element is  “ inducting ”  heating eddy currents in a pot !

james veitch is  “ inducting ”  a  “ suspension of disbelief ” 

the meaning of  “ induct ”  and  “ induce ”  at a semantic level and not a syntaxical level is different

“ induct ”  connotes forcible conscription into some sort of club in a way that  “ induce ”  doesnʼt

----------------------

yeah   that's  one of the meanings i was wanting, poetry works by clusters of associations rather than limited highly demarcated and exculsionary definitions

the succor of females, what males are overdesigned for

the succor of females  what males are overdesigned for

audio

elizabeth bergner   I  II   childless ,  you can see the   energy  !

 image patters, thematic obsessions, semantic variations recur from play to play, lighting up  my  mind as they lit up sir henry nevilleʼs 

sometimes you just want to sit down and cry for your life, the endless fuck-ups  !

. .


o


(


)

sometimes you just want to sit down and cry for your life, the endless fuck-ups  !

. .


o


(

sometimes you just want to sit down and cry for your life, the endless fuck-ups  !

: o (

sometimes you just want to sit down and cry for your life, the endless fuck-ups  !

sometimes you just want to sit down and cry for your life, the endless fuck-ups !

sometimes you just want to sit down and cry for your life, the endless fuck-ups

sometimes you just want to sit down and cry for your life

what is it  ?  there is something different ,  some different earth i stand on

what is it  ?  there is something different  some different earth i stand on

what is it  there is something different  some different earth i stand on


what is it ? there is something different  some different earth i stand on

audio

what am i doing ?  what N O T  !

what am i doing ?  what NOT !

what am i doing ?  whatnot

what am i doing what N O T  !

what am i doing what NOT !

what am i doing whatnot

what am i doing what N O T

what am i doing what NOT

what am i doing whatnot

what am i doing ?  what N O T  !

what am i doing ?  what NOT !

what am i doing ?  whatnot

what am i doing what N O T  !

what am i doing what NOT !

what am i doing whatnot

what am i doing what N O T

what am i doing what NOT

what am i doing whatnot

you say such and such, and i say such and such, once i would have said  ‘ where do we go from here ’ ,  but now i say  ‘ there is nowhere to go from here ’

you say such and such  and i say such and such  once i would have said  ‘ where do we go from here ’ ,  but now i say  ‘ thereʼs nowhere to go from here ’

audio

sepehr   w r i t e s

iʼve gone from getting my degree in neuroscience, decapitating rats and becoming depressed, to working night shifts in a gas station and fucking up my circadian rhythm to the point of feeling like a zombie, and now to lifting heavy boxes for 4 hrs straight  (my arms feeling like theyʼre about to burst)  and becoming extremely sore

goddammit.

i wish i could find a part-time job that didnʼt suck and it makes me depressed

my

r e p l y

sepehr, thereʼs no money in the play, shouldnʼt you be focused on getting skills for better paying jobs ?

emily dickinson wrote her poems on scraps of used paper and the back of letters etc. because she couldnʼt afford to buy new unused paper, bukowskiʼs poverty is famous of course and saʼdi worked for many years as a slave building crusader fortifications !

your energy is going into arguing with me and you are not hearing what i am saying or looking at life issues !

well at least you understood the circadian rhythm problems of night shift work, thatʼs a big plus, plenty go half a lifetime before realising that !

----------------------

my view is you are using this unseen play like some sort bluff card, in fact your writing canʼt be better than your recent posting . .

you have a lot of life skill and approach issues, you know iʼm very much older so i recognise them from my own mistakes

i donʼt think the real life company you keep is any help to you and really life is too hard without a reasonable income

i donʼt get any peace and am not bothered about visiting disturbance on others . .

----------------------

can i suggest that when you are ready to show your play, then show it, otherwise donʼt talk about or try to  “presell”  it !

my own experience is i never know what i am going write ahead of time and certainly donʼt talk about it, and still donʼt even after it is written !

that means i am actually doing something, other areas of life i talk about and donʼt ever do anything effective !

sepehr

r e p l i e s

thatʼs good advice

if you just said that, i wouldʼve shut up

i was just getting very offended when you said my play will suck

my

r e p l y

the play at this point is really between you and your beta readers

in terms of the play we are outsiders here and donʼt want to know anything about it, short of it being finished/published/made known !


sepehr, can i just explain the situation !

i really have better things to do with my time than talk to you, really i do !

you donʼt accept the fundamental tenants of the instrumentality of large amounts of solitary time needed and some degree of estrangement from  “entertainment”

if you donʼt do that then you donʼt get the instrumentality and as it is you run around in some busy superdense and largely purile media space . .

you have never in the time we have been corresponding really veered from your  “waiting at the end of time”  paradigm which is just to wait and be entertained one way or another . .

7th patriarch zen is the recovery of a lost celibate tradition and you are using me for your entertainment and validation . .

its my blog and when you impose your wrong mindedness and diss what i am saying then i feel obliged to  “ decompress ”  you and what you say, this process is part of a huge wake that still shows years later, when you entered into posting here you stirred up that wake and canʼt expect if you stop posting for me to stop the decompression process . .

zakaj posted a u.g. krishnamurti video, particularly i donʼt want to end up like u.g. ,  some sort of scratching post for the endless idiots this sort of work attracts, the half arsed  hubric

is it my fault you have elected to remain amongst those

go away and bother your like, not me !

sepehr you are not writing a great book ,  (ed. his  play)  just giving the world what it is filled to the brim of, derivative junk !

for one brought up with the net, you seem surprisingly out of touch with today's publishing realities, a world awash with useless words and all you can do is add to the pile !

this blog is about 7th patriarch zen, a charitable endeavour on my part as there is no good information apart from what i write on the subject today, but you have twisted and distorted it so i am not happy with you !

i reserve the right to decompress the bad experience you have given me, it will take months or even a year or so, if you donʼt want to be mentioned go away and let time erode my memory of you to abatement ! : o)

with drugs and alcohol, peopleʼs brains go, all that is left is their hubricity

with drugs, peopleʼs brains go, all that is left is their hubricity

i wrote my own   play  in a few minutes, an hour including editing and fact checking . .

the reason sepehr is taking so long to write his, two years and counting ?  is he is using otherʼs experience in a very episodic way and has none of his own to draw on, its just an unfused mash !

i do use other people a lot  (monet in this case) ,  but its not hypocritical, i am these people, their experience is mine . .

but that is the benefit of great artists and writers, their experience is immediate and conveyable, murky retards like ligotti and their fawning menials are beneath contempt  !  .  .

the human condition is insane, zen is no different from that

the human condition is insane  zen is no different from that

audio

i have a huge backlog of recordings from 2012 and i figure the only way i can motivate myself to edit and put them up is do one a day and post them as current, however long it takes !

i donʼt quite agree with what i said here actually, my eyes have been opened by understanding better and seeing the celibate authetic masters like joshu, that there are a few of these people like joshu and foyan who actually understand what it is about

poetry is an abstraction bloodied

wallace stevens

one of the big mistakes with the web and this has taken me so long to learn, is that it is not representative of any population you might encounter in real life .  .

it has 60% complete hubric arseholes, and it doesnʼt do your self esteem any good to deal with these monsters !

women have more knee  problems  than men because their knee ligaments are made more flexible by estrogen !

what i am saying is increased flexibility can cause joint problems !

my mother entered a poem in a competition and it got second place, but it was much better than the first !

my mother entered a poem in a competition and it got second place, but it was much better than the first

giverny looks idyllic, but monet had to fight to keep the army from building a shooting range within earshot of his house !

i have noticed that second place winners in arts, literary and music competitions are often better than the first, says something about the judges and the nature of the people who want to make those decisions unfortunately !

i have noticed that second place winners in arts and literary competitions are often better than the first, says something about the judges and the nature of the people who want to make those decisions unfortunately !

i have noticed that second place winners in arts and literary competitions are often better than the first, says something about the judges and the nature of the people who want to make those decisions unfortunately

i have noticed that second place winners in arts, literary and music competitions are often better than the first, says something about judges and the nature of the people who want to make those decisions unfortunately !

i have noticed that second place winners in arts and literary competitions are often better than the first, says something about judges and the nature of the people who want to make those decisions unfortunately !

i have noticed that second place winners in arts and literary competitions are often better than the first, says something about judges and the nature of the people who want to make those decisions unfortunately

‘ my uncleʼs affection ’   the title of something  how or what or why i donʼt know

‘ my uncleʼs affection ’   the title of something  how or what or why i donʼt know

‘ my uncleʼs affection ’   the title of something  how what or why i donʼt know

my uncleʼs affection  the title of something  how what or why i donʼt know

audio

he walks along a

dusty

mountain

road

and

calls

it

‘ suchness ’

thatʼs

his

problem

others

notice

what

speaks !

he walks along a

dusty

mountain

road

and

calls

it

‘ suchness ’

thatʼs

his

problem

others

notice

what

speaks

he walks along a

dusty

mountain

road

and

calls

it

‘ suchness ’

thatʼs

his

problem

others

just   notice

what

speaks !


he walks along a

dusty

mountain

road

and

calls

it

‘ suchness ’

thatʼs

his

problem

others

just   notice

what

speaks

he walks along a

dusty

mountain

road

and

calls

it

‘ suchness ’

thatʼs

his

problem

others

just   notice

what

speaks

he walks along a

dusty

mountain

road

and

calls

it

‘ suchness ’

thatʼs

his

problem

others

just

notice

what

speaks

logic tells me one thing, emotions another !

. .


o


(


)

logic tells me one thing, emotions another !

. .


o


)


(

logic tells me one thing, emotions another !

: o (

logic tells me one thing, emotions another !

:

o

(

logic tells me one thing, emotions another !

logic tells me one thing, emotions another

i really think iʼm a bit mad, getting involved in too much, always stretched to breaking point

i really think iʼm a bit mad, getting involved in too much, always stretched  to breaking point

i really think iʼm a bit mad   getting involved in too much always stretched  to breaking point   v2p1

i really think iʼm a bit mad, getting involved in too much, always stretched to to breaking point

i really think iʼm a bit mad  getting involved in too much  always stretched to to breaking point

i really think iʼm a bit mad   getting involved in too much  always stretched to to breaking point

i really think iʼm a bit mad   getting involved in too much always stretched to to breaking point   v2

i think iʼm a bit mad, getting involved in too much, always being stretched beyond breaking point

i think iʼm a bit mad  getting involved in too much  always being stretched beyond breaking point

i think iʼm a bit mad, getting involved in too much, always stretching beyond breaking point

i think iʼm a bit mad  getting involved in too much  always stretching beyond breaking point

i really think iʼm a bit mad, get involved in too much, always stretched beyond breaking point

i really think iʼm a bit mad  get involved in too much  always stretched beyond breaking point   v1

i really think iʼm a bit mad, getting involved in too much, always stretched to breaking point

i really think iʼm a bit mad, getting involved in too much, always stretched  to breaking point

i really think iʼm a bit mad   getting involved in too much always stretched  to breaking point

v2p1

i really think iʼm a bit mad, getting involved in too much, always stretched to to breaking point

i really think iʼm a bit mad  getting involved in too much  always stretched to to breaking point

i really think iʼm a bit mad   getting involved in too much  always stretched to to breaking point

i really think iʼm a bit mad   getting involved in too much always stretched to to breaking point

v2

i think iʼm a bit mad, getting involved in too much, always being stretched beyond breaking point

i think iʼm a bit mad  getting involved in too much  always being stretched beyond breaking point

i think iʼm a bit mad, getting involved in too much, always stretching beyond breaking point

i think iʼm a bit mad  getting involved in too much  always stretching beyond breaking point

i really think iʼm a bit mad, get involved in too much, always stretched beyond breaking point

i really think iʼm a bit mad  get involved in too much  always stretched beyond breaking point

v1

you dodged a bullet and now you get to see in slow motion what you dodged !

three cheers for  ‘ j ’  !

but donʼt be drawn back into the mess, its not your  problem  !


so the play opens with the frame filled with monetʼs  ‘ study of a figure outdoors  :  woman with a parasol, facing left ’ and morphs to an actual reality scene of monet’s intial vision of suzanne hoschedé on the embankment of the  ‘  l'ile  aux orties ’ ,  then him painting that picture back in the studio at giverny and then morphs back to the microscopically written play in the bottom right hand corner of the painting and the words are read to say the play starts with the frame filled with monetʼs . .

thatʼs a good monet, the wind integrates the three elements, the woman, the grass and wildflowers and the sky

if you look in the bottom right hand corner of the   painting  with an electron microscope you can clearly see etched sepehrs new play so at this point the world obviously exists different to what i think ! : o)

father uzhannalil has not been  heard  from since, but the franciscan sisters of siessen posted a message on their facebook page on sunday claiming they had been informed of his torture, and said they believed he will be crucified on good friday

“ this calls for serious concerted prayers from all of us ”   the sisters said

ask reddit

I try to be extremely understanding when people make mistakes, I just remember that I make mistakes too, plenty of them

Never give Crazy a baby

Donʼt date a cheater.  If sheʼll do it with you, sheʼll do it to you

When i borrow something to make sure i give it back in the condition that i got it.  Borrow a car, add gas.  Borrow a tool, clean grime off of it

the lipid layer on the tear surface acts as a  retaining  wall and also prevents evaporation of the water !

look across the centuries or you will go insane with the contemporary

audio

starwars  8  is a form of drinking or drug taking, numbing oneself to reality with the most godawful pap !

where am i, where am i going ?

who am i, what am i doing ?

where am i, where am i going

who am i, what am i doing

where am i  where am i going

who am i  what am i doing

audio

where am i where am i going

who am i what am i doing

more lost than usual, a bit of fear but the incoherence of things falling apart fatally !

: o (

audio

it occured to me that my dialogue or back and  forth  with sepehr on the 7th zen patriarch blog might be a play as well as anything else !

it occured to me that my dialogue or back and  forth  with sepehr on the 7th zen patriarch blog might be a play as well as anything else

if you donʼt have children, any relationship is aborted depth !

if you donʼt have children, any relationship is aborted depth

this  is not necessarily a bad thing,   “ power browsing ”  going for high richness information content

in other words you problem solve better !

see my writing is small dense nuggets, not welded into a coherent whole . .

the way i write is for an attention span of five minutes, which is actually what my attention span is anyway !

sepehr :   jason and jon in fact have not copied this on their blogs, but seen the light as to the way attention span is going . .

its you who are out on a limb, writing a play which requires heaps of constant attention which doesnʼt suit modern net savvy audiences

a great   video  of arabian desert scenery in jordon !

the trouble with writing is it takes critical mass to be effective and that takes all of your attention !

this is why the lives of quality writers are a wreck, writing first, life second !

the trouble with writing is it takes critical mass to be effective and that takes complete attention !

this is why the lives of quality writers are a wreck, writing first, life second !

the trouble with writing is it takes critical mass to be effective and that takes all of your attention !

this is why the lives of quality writers are a wreck, writing first, life second

the trouble with writing is it takes critical mass to be effective and that takes complete attention !

this is why the lives of quality writers are a wreck, writing first, life second

the trouble with writing is it takes critical mass to be effective and that takes all of your attention

this is why the lives of quality writers are a wreck, writing first, life second

the trouble with writing is it takes critical mass to be effective and that takes complete attention

this is why the lives of quality writers are a wreck, writing first, life second

sepehr   w r i t e s

my solitude has shown me life is more despairing than we think

by  ‘ despairing ’ ,  i do not mean it in the sense of pain, but in the sense of everything being insufficient

you finding beauty in life is insufficient

all human love and attachment is insufficient

this is what you have said and speaks more to me than your hypocritical hippy love attitude

our lives are totally meaningless in the grand scheme of the human travail, that we cannot help parse some sense into it  —  clinging to it for a sense of self-validation

we are all our own dictators at the end of the day

sepehr   w r i t e s

also, i recently had a well-mannered debate with zakaj where i defended your and derridaʼs process  ontology  over hinduismʼs idealistic monism


sepehr   suggests

like I've said, if my play is 7thzenpatriarch material, which means it is not entertainment, then I request one hundred dollars and no more insults

my

r e p l y

the union of 7th zen patriarch  “ material ”  and literature and art is  “ magical realism ”  which can be done quite subtly in monet and jane austen and more overtly as in  ‘ twelfth night ‘  with the complete external identity of the twins and the alphabet raining down from the sky in one of janet frameʼs books

that is great art and glimmers and shines with infinity, its a tall ask !

even lindt seems to have  problems  with cadmium and  lead  in the cocoa !

“ my experience is not media entertainment 

i have been reading a lot of good poetry and such

 i donʼt understand why you are constantly antagonizing me lately ”

sepehr this is my blog and you are not listening !

g o a w a y

i got better things to do than waste of time idiots !

you treat the 7th zen patriarch blog like you own it, you canʼt even see that, mr.  “inconsiderate” ,  you really have problems with common courtesy, you know real life stuff !

sepehr, when you delete posts you are trying to craft an image to present to the world !

instead, you need to be yourself to the world and leave them up !

thatʼs thatʼs the difference between the specious bullshit you write and acting doing something which is not deleting your posts that you think donʼt reflect the image you want to project !

----------------------

“ I deleted the posts because I realized it was due to a misunderstanding ” 

i've got records of your posts, i know what they say, you are not being honest !

“ my experience is not media entertainment ”

that's not true either is it?

you are not being honest with yourself and you are not being honest with me !

i really want a year of no contact with you, there's no point in arguing, i just want that !

it will take me a while to decompress you, i will still use you as a discussion point on   “ pending_poems ”  but will only refer to you via an initial !

so if you are listening what am i asking ?  is agreement that difficult ?

----------------------

sepehr, iʼve asked for a yearʼs no contact, thatʼs a major ask but you have not replied to that question !

you criticise me lumping you with zakaj as you claim to be different, but both of you just skip over the important issues though zakaj did finally get that his  “guru pushing”  was incompatible with the 7th zen patriarch approach !

for all i know you could be writing a commercially successful play but thatʼs not what this blog is about . .

you have different interests . .

so my ask is for a years no contact, can you reply to this ?

----------------------

the point is not whether i dislike your play or not, but whether this dialogue is productive for me !

its like my dealings with zakaj, initially productive and then it became unproductive because he didnʼt move forwards

there is a wall between us and it just hasnʼt changed but our contact has now become unproductive to me and i donʼt think its healthy for you at this point, you have different interests and in my view its time to break contact . .

you are writing your own play and you need to cultivate your own audience and in my view the best way to do that is use anime and play/drama authoring tools to put up a video or is that too real world for you ?

i have the same issue, i canʼt afford the time this dialoguing is taking ,  life's requirement is for me to get back into real life more . .

----------------------

sepehr   suggests

like I've said, if my play is 7thzenpatriarch material, which means it is not entertainment, then I request one hundred dollars and no more insults

my

r e p l y

the union of 7th zen patriarch  “ material ”  and literature and art is  “ magical realism ”  which can be done quite subtly in monet and jane austen and more overtly as in  ‘ twelfth night ‘  with the complete external identity of the twins and the alphabet raining down from the sky in one of janet frameʼs books

that is great art and glimmers and shines with infinity, its a tall ask !

sepehr, your post itself is conflict and this reply is conflict

for one thing you think i have no judgment and i can say  “ we disagree on a fundamental level ”  and you can tell me i am wrong and that this is some simple matter of variance over a few minor issues

if you werenʼt in conflict then the whole point of zen and me being an approved master sanctioned directly by the sixth patriarch would be pointless . . .

like it doesnʼt take a lifetimes work and being basically clelibate . .

some johnny come lately like yourself whose experience is media entertainment and total obtuseness to what he is being told . .

if you get really basic differences of opinion, you get a lot of hostility !

:

o

(

if you get really basic differences of opinion, you get a lot of hostility !

if you get really basic differences of opinion, you get a lot of hostility

the problem is, sepehr, why we are always bound to a huge degree of conflict is we disagree very fundamentally

that degree of conflict is too wearing and distracting from way more important things in life

the problem is sepehr, why we are always bound to a huge degree of conflict is we disagree very fundamentally

that degree of conflict is too wearing and distracting from way more important things in life

a monk asked joshu

 what is the depth of the deep ?

joshu replied

 what is the depth of the deep i should talk about, the seven of the seven or the eight of the eight ?

my

r e p l y

74  visions

86  moonlight sonatas

sepehr, i really want to avoid a situation where we are all burning each others time to no effect !

sepehr, i really want to avoid a situation where we are all burning each others time to no effect

rural as an antidote to the nightmare of modern urban complexity

rural  as an antidote  to the nightmare   of modern  urban  complexity

v2

rural as an antidote to the nightmare of modern complexity

rural as an antidote  to the nightmare of modern complexity

v1

all the men, all the grey men were moving through the shadows of their cloistered existance, a few minutes of sunshine and into the shadows again

interestingly this was a vision ,  grey wraithlike men moving though a shadowlike cloister

all the men, all the grey men were moving through the shadows of their cloistered existance, a few minutes of sunshine and into the shadows again

all the men, all the grey men were moving through the shadows of their existance, a few minutes of sunshine and into the shadows again

real creative effort is when you actually produce   I  II ,   i have it easy with writing and html, but a play needs more  !

i have my advice for you in the recent entries below on this page

i canʼt really say more than that, you donʼt think its valid or you think it contrived or whatever

you, like zakaj are an endless sink of need and its not my business to supply what you yourself are unwilling to do !

----------------------

sepehr, thereʼs some wall thatʼs come between us, things change, i donʼt think its healthy for you to hold that  attitude  and be posting to me and perhaps its not healthy for me either to be locked into the constant decompression that replying to you entails

i learnt with reddit zen to only read and not post there, maybe that would work for you, read my writing if you wish and donʼt post !

the world loves mediocrity !

“ good ”  is seen in that light !

personally i donʼt give a fig for what anyone thinks of my writing tho it is gratifying to see it appreciated !

tassajara, green gulch and the sfzc are on the bones of their arses financially and peoplewise

ed.   late march 2016

“ but one of my teachers legacy is butter.  the temple ran out of butter and money so my teacher used her own to buy three months worth ”

“ at the moment, i am the shop manager, the medical team leader  (wilderness emt) ,  on the community emergency response team, and sewing my priest robes.  why ?  because we lack a steady base of students who can commit for a few years!

all this and we're sitting 6-12 hours a day 6 months a year, that's 6 sesshins of 5, 7 or 9 days (which is pretty sweet, it's my  “job”  to sit).  now the summers are a different story.  it's 2 hrs of sitting, 10 hrs of work.  we open the gates in the summer, 100s of people come, and close them from september to may, which is really rare  —  never been in a place so quiet other than alaska, to my surprise ”

my

r e p l y

proof positive that sitting by itself is counter productive ,  i have never seen such a bunch of hardened useless yahoos !

the whole kosher thing is ridiculous !

the whole kosher thing is ridiculous

sepehr writes that his play is about   this

my

r e p l y

i already know what your play is about, it canʼt be any different from what you are

the play is not any answer, it will reflect your errors

----------------------

i know what you are writing because i am reading your posts !

its the same problem as zakaj, just half worked voynich, i'm not going to step in and fix it for you !

everything is just a folding and rolling forwards and backwards !

everything is just a folding and rolling forwards and backwards

everything is just a folding and rolling forward and backwards

sepehr, what you have to do is take   meaningful   in one hand and  “ meaningless ”  in the other and juggle them to get meaning which comes from the balls in motion, not static representation like you are  (trying)  to do !

i can instantly tell whether some-one is enlightened or understands through this, the way they have too solid a sense of some schema they are trying to impose

its the motion and the fluidity of movement through the motion . .

‘ the jackson estate  sold  its share of sony/atv to sony for  $750  million ’

no wonder michael jackson had so much money !

“ i  (ed.  paul mcCartney)  gave michael a lot of free advice !

and you know what ?

a fish gets caught by opening his mouth ”

richard the thirdʼs scoliosistic back and a  reconstruction  of his face !

it was actually  ‘ occasional ’  drinkers  —  people who had less than one drink per week  —  who lived the  longest

jesus even the full moon rises too fast !

. .


o


(


)

jesus even the full moon rises too fast !

jesus even the full moon rises too fast

jesus even the moon rises too fast !

. .


o


(


)

jesus even the moon rises too fast !

jesus even the moon rises too fast

infinity is meaning and meaninglessness combined  !

infinity is meaning and meaninglessness combined

if i said infinity is meaning and meaningless combined  !

if i said infinity is meaning and meaningless combined

infinity is meaning and meaningless ? !

if i said infinity was meaning and meaningless ? !

if i said infinity is meaning and meaningless ? !

if i said infinity was meaning and meaningless ! ?


if i said infinity was meaning and meaningless !

if i said infinity is meaning and meaningless ! ?

if i said infinity is meaning and meaningless !

if i said infinity is meaning and meaningless

if i said infinity was meaning and meaningless ?

if i said infinity was meaning and meaningless

audio

nonsense never ceases does it  ? ! ?

chalres bukowski replying to the offering of an apple from her garden by the wife of the supposed german publisher of his work after said person repudiated paying for a very expensive dinner at a restaurant in germany that charles, his wife and some other guests were attending !

nonsense never ceases does it  ? ! ?

nonsense never ceases does it ? ! ?

nonsense never ceases does it ? !

nonsense never ceases does it ?

nonsense never ceases does it

sebastian to olivia   (twelfth night)

don't marry me, i am the raw edge of infinity !

sebastian to olivia   (twelfth night)

don't marry me, i am the raw edge of infinity

i am certain

he is certain

certainty has a field day !

but one of us was right

and the other is wrong

i am certain

he is certain

certainty has a field day

but one of us was right

and the other wrong

i am certain  he is certain  certainty has a field day !  but one of us was right  and the other is wrong

i am certain  he is certain  certainty has a field day  but one of us was right  and the other is wrong

i am certain  he is certain  certainty has a field day !  but one of us is right  and the other is wrong

v2


i am certain

he is certain

certainty has a field day

but one of us is right

and the other is wrong

i am certain  he is certain  certainty has a field day  but one of us is right  and the other is wrong

v1

all is beauty, beauty is all

john keats, i hold thee in thrall !

: o )

all is beauty, beauty is all

john keats, i hold thee in thrall !

all is beauty, beauty is all

i was just thinking of zakaj, he has to connect two things, what he really thinks and what he thinks, he doesnʼt understand how different they are !

sepehr  w r i t e s  (quoted) ,  with my replies

“ i say a lot of your writing is good, but recently, it hasnʼt been quite there.  not everything we churn out can always reach our best level ”

the thing with my older poems i was writing less so it looks like i was producing more of that sort of material relative to other things !

“  . .  and currently you're looking quite grotesque with your incessant insults and battering of others ”

iʼd beat them to a bloody pulp with an axe handle if i could, words donʼt break the needed bones ! :o)

i donʼt glorify solitude i glorify what comes with it . .

last night i was out hunting and just sat on a branch for an hour and  ‘ felt ’  the night sky moonlit landscape and complete absence of human noise . .

you are welcome to anime and wrong minded preaching . .

----------------------

“ I let it decimate me and become one with the impersonal flow of the black gyrating stars ”

thatʼs the wrong space and no doubt why you are choking on what i am writing

the space i am talking about is full and encompasses all of life and includes human love and attachment  ‘ at rest in the bosom ’  of infinity so to speak, this is the problem, one of the divides if you live for human attachment

because of this and that investment in and allowance of the  “ full ”  space when i write and talk i am looking from the  “ other side of death ”  to you

there's no horror in this space, its all beauty . .

i noticed i shrugged my shoulders writing that . .

sepehr, the problem is, you want things in discrete jumps, but its kaizen or  ‘ successive approximation ’  that gives the meta/s !

the most successful published book of recent years is  “ fifty shades of grey ”  which in fact was evolutionary writing, going from first time writing in the form of fan fiction, building up skills and an audience and then the last stage was publishing and a film that delivered the financial rewards !

sepehr, the problem is, you want things in discrete lumps, but its kaizen or  ‘ successive approximation ’  that gives the meta/s !

the most successful published book of recent years is  “ fifty shades of grey ”  which in fact was evolutionary writing, going from first time writing in the form of fan fiction, building up skills and an audience and then the last stage was publishing and a film that delivered the financial rewards !

there are some really smart people around, if understanding were simply a matter of intelligence then life would be understood

as it is the road of self abnegation must be taken . .

who takes this road ?

actually its more like one is cast upon it !

there are some really smart people around, if understanding were simply a matter of intelligence then life would be understood

as it is the road of self abnegation must be taken . .

the world is full of mediocre talents pissing on anything of quality, do you feel comfortable amongst those ?

i t i s t e l l i n g . .

the world is full of mediocre talents pissing on anything of quality, do you feel comfortable amongst those ?

i t  i s  t e l l i n g . .

sepehr, you are rather a dull moth attracted to the flame of my better writing  .  .

the world is full of mediocre talents pissing on anything of quality, do you feel comfortable amongst those ?

i t i s t e l l i n g . .

sepehr, you are rather a dull moth attracted to the flame of my better writing  .  .

the world is full of mediocre talents pissing on anything of quality, do you feel comfortable amongst those ?

i t  i s  t e l l i n g . .

you are rather a dull moth attracted to the flame of my better writing  .  .

sepehr, you are rather a dull moth attracted to the flame of my better writing  .  .

you are rather a dull moth attracted to the flame of my better writing . .

sepehr, you are rather a dull moth attracted to the flame of my better writing . .

reality canʼt be understood by itself, reality ,   it can in fact only be understood by unreality  !

reality canʼt be understood by itself, reality ,   it can actually only be understood by unreality  !

reality canʼt be understood by itself, reality ,   it can only be understood by unreality  !

reality canʼt be understood by itself, reality ,  it can only be understood by unreality  !

reality canʼt be understood by itself, reality ,  it can only be understood by unreality !

reality canʼt be understood by itself, reality ,  it can only be understood by unreality

reality canʼt be understood by itself, reality , it can only be understood by unreality

reality canʼt be understood by itself, reality, it can only be understood by unreality

the female philosophy ,  “ men are there to be fooled ”  !

the female philosophy ,  “ men are there to be fooled ”  !

the female philosophy ,  “ men are there to be fooled ”  !

the female philosophy ,  men are there to be fooled !

the female philosophy ,  men are there to be fooled

the patriarch vision involves an estrangement from human passions, to think or suppose otherwise is to fool oneself !

the patriarch vision involves an estrangement from human passions, to think or suppose otherwise is to fool oneself

the patriarch vision involves an estrangement from human passions, to think or suppose otherwise is to fool yourself !

the patriarch vision involves an estrangement from human passions, to think or suppose otherwise is to fool yourself

viola   walking  towards the countʼs castle looking for employment there

another good image, its interesting again what is in the play and has to be brought out in different productions . .

i think more than the other characters its viola who is unreal, a supercompetent mirage of a life we will never attain . .

jon   a s k s

whatʼs so hard about starting a blog ?

maybe thereʼs just a few who like doing it

my

r e p l y

writing a blog is actually contemplative work because you are looking and reflecting on reality which can include your personal life of course

i was interested to see the zen master foyan complain about monks basically proxying and not doing any real contemplation and one sees the same issues today . .

the brain changes that are involved in contemplation are actively avoided because it is so traumatic . .

so s. and z. deliberately are adverse to it, its no accident that they don't blog . .

the degree of con with people who pretend to do something is simply amazing . .

and then they whimper about being verbally beaten up . .

well if they did any real contemplation they would get the skills to cope instead of going around in endless circles they would be constantly moving forward and be ahead of the game . .

picking up a bronze bell on the  seabed  at 547 meters depth from an I-400 submarine scuttled in 1946 off the coast of oʼahu

amazing   technology   !

the trouble with the net is you never quite know what is really going on with people !

. .


o


(


)

the trouble with the net is you never quite know what is really going on with people !

. .


o


(

the trouble with the net is you never quite know what is really going on with people !

: o (

the trouble with the net is you never quite know what is really going on with people !

the trouble with the net is you never quite know what is really going on with people

actors and writers are a malfunctional lot !

actors and writers are a malfunctional lot

thereʼs no answer that you donʼt come at but through the travails of toil !

thereʼs no answer that you donʼt come at but through the travails of toil

thereʼs no answer but that you donʼt come at through the travails of toil !

thereʼs no answer but that you donʼt come at through the travails of toil

its fascinating that if you look at the three major productions of  ‘ twelfth night ’  on the web, 1969,   1988  and  1996   they all capture and highlight different aspects of it . .

that is all aspects are there in the play but only certain highlights seem to be able to come across in each of the different real life performances !

“ thy mind is a very opal

i would have men of such constancy put to sea, that their business might be every thing and their intent everywhere

for thatʼs it that always makes a good voyage of nothing

farewell ”

to understand zen and infinity it has to mean more than wife and child and therefore if there be wife and child it cannot mean more

therefore it is only without wife and child it may be understood !


so what i am saying is contemplation makes the brain bigger and work better by reorganizing and this is why proxying with ceremonies, beliefs and the regurgitation of scriptures, records or quotes is such bullshit . .

its something that happens to you and your brain and its an active process !

i donʼt agree with tony parsons, thereʼs something to what he says, but thereʼs something missing too !

i donʼt agree with tony parsons, thereʼs something to what he says, but thereʼs something missing too


contemplative work is a style of organized  forgetting ,  you reorganize so that what is remembered subsumes what is forgotten, the paradoxical what is forgotten is remembered . .

that is the enlightenment  p r o c e s s

it canʼt be forged . .

contemplative work is a style of organized  ‘ forgetting ’ ,  you reorganize so that what is remembered subsumes what is forgotten, the paradoxical what is forgotten is remembered . .

that is the enlightenment  p r o c e s s

it canʼt be forged . .

reddit    overheard

a young man, bitching to his friend at poolside at the club that both the learjet and the lamborghini were in the workshop, so what was he to do with his time ?

borderline personality disorder equals  ‘ incorrigibly hubric ’

borderline personality disorder  =  ‘ incorrigibly hubric ’

borderline personality disorder equals   “ incorrigibly hubric ”

borderline personality disorder  =   “incorrigibly hubric”

borderline personality disorder equals incorrigibly hubric

borderline personality disorder  =  incorrigibly hubric

where am i  ?  !  ?  !

where am i  ?  !  ?

where am i  ?

where am i ?

where am i

taking off the gauntlet

it

fell

to

the

ground

would

anybody

pick

it

up ?

taking off the gauntlet

it

fell

to

the

ground

would

anyone

pick

it

up ?

taking off the gauntlet

it

fell

to

the

ground

would

it

be

picked

up ?

taking off the gauntlet

it

fell

to

the

ground

would

anybody

pick

it

  up ?

taking off the gauntlet

it

fell

to

the

ground

would

anyone

pick

it

  up ?

taking off the gauntlet

it

fell

to

the

ground

would

it

be

picked

  up ?

people donʼt  change  and if that doesnʼt say it all, what does !?

. .


o


)


(

people donʼt change and if that doesnʼt say it all, what does !?

. .


o


(


)

people donʼt change and if that doesnʼt say it all, what does !?

:o)

people donʼt change and if that doesnʼt say it all, what does !?

people donʼt change and if that doesnʼt say it all, what does

“ there is no destination 

nowhere to go

there is only the path

you are walking on right now ”

there is a destination

somewhere to go

the path you are walking on

l e a d s a w a y . .

hinduism, two thousand years of paedophile bilious crap !

hinduism, two thousand years of paedophile bilious crap

hinduism, two thousand years of bilious paedophile crap !

hinduism, two thousand years of bilious paedophile crap

What relish is in this ?  how runs the   stream  ?

Or I am mad, or else this is a dream

Let fancy still my sense in Lethe steep;

If it be thus to dream, still let me sleep !

if it be thus to dream still let me sleep

the whirlygig of time brings in his revenges

the clown,  ‘ twelfth night ’  act five scene one

write like a moron

think like a moron

be   like a moron

uh - oh

that   is

a

moron !

write like a moron

think like a moron

be like a moron

uh - oh

that is

a

moron !

zj.

write like a moron

think like a moron

be   like a moron

uh - oh

that   is

a

moron !

 zj.

write like a moron

think like a moron

be like a moron

uh - oh

that is

a

moron !

i think the thing about plays is they are not designed for reading

they are designed to be seen and reading falls short because the actors ,  actresses and director’s  bring so much to them !

i think the thing about plays is they are not designed for reading

they are designed to be seen and reading falls short because the actors ,  actresses and director’s  bring so much to them

sir henry neville is the clearest example of text not being text . .

text is him and his life and not that of an underworld standover man and mafioso !

i think sir henry neville is the clearest example of text not being text . .

text is him and his life and not that of an underworld standover man and mafioso !


i remember seeing twelfth night at secondary school as a stage play, very well done and it made an impact

now i have just watched it again and this   scene  struck me as magical realism and the whole of sir henry nevilleʼs works are in fact magical realism from an alternate, neville oriented version of history to the completely phantasmagorical  ‘ the tempest ’

i just cannot understand the denial of the shakespeare wrote shakespeare academia . .  it cuts off so much understanding from this wonderful work and man . .

the seminal vesicles are a significant   repository  of malign microbiome !

“ these tubular glands produce seminal fluid, are located in an environment that is temperature controlled and is rich in carbohydrates needed to feed bacteria ”

people just have opinions without doing any in depth research and think that since the opinion is their own it must be right !

people just have opinions without doing any in depth research and think that since the opinion is their own it must be right

people just have opinions without in depth research and think that since the opinion is their own it must be right !

people just have opinions without in depth research and think that since the opinion is their own it must be right

if shakespeare wrote those plays, then the powers of invention are too great ,  it is beyond genius  !

if shakespeare wrote those plays, then the powers of invention are too great ,  it is beyond genius

if shakespeare wrote shakespeare, then the powers of invention are too great ,  it is beyond genius  !

if shakespeare wrote shakespeare, then the powers of invention are too great ,  it is beyond genius

how much  hypocrisy  can you get in a frontispiece ?

quite a bit apparently !

: o(

johanna lumley   recites   viola’s soliloquy  (act two, scene two)  in  ‘ twelfth  night ʼ

( a quarter the way down the linked page )

these words are completely impossible to have come from some-one of william shakespeare’s background

they came from the family wealth, continental tour and upper class background of sir henry neville !

“ no need to be a  pompous  arsehole ”

when someone offers me a valid correction, i take it on board without being abusive !

when someone offers me a valid correction, i take it on board without being abusive !

when someone offers me a valid correction, i take it on board without being abusive

when the fictions true, truth is fiction  !

when reality is untrue, truth is reality  !

when the fictions true, truth is fiction

when reality is untrue, truth is reality  !

when the fictions true, truth is fiction !

when reality is untrue, truth is reality !

when the fictions true, truth is fiction

when reality is untrue, truth is reality !

when the fictions true, truth is fiction

when reality is untrue, truth is reality

jon   writes

I still donʼt like poetry for the most part

It seems kinda fucking gay

my

r e p l y

yeah poets are gender blurred

“ I can rip someone apart ”

thatʼs female and not male !

jon asks if that’s because  “ females deal with emotional poison ”

my

r e p l y

alexander the greatʼs  mother  had her ex husbandʼs  (alexanderʼs newly assassinated father)  widow roasted alive when alexander took his fathers place

if you do hunting you will understand, its just a practical business to be done as quickly and neatly as possible, nothing really except a slight sadness for the animal you have killed depending on how much empathy you have for that species  !

this guy was meditating right before bed and he heard the voice of a work colleague speaking to him and immediately the colleagueʼs face  “came to mind”

i suggested a better universe to dial was   this  !  : o)

false-belief, a fascinating difference between ages   three and five   ! 

manic again  ?  then the crash, then the semi retraction, then the mania again  ?

manic again ? then the crash, then the semi retraction, then the mania again ?

if some-one doesnʼt want contact with someone-else, but that someonelse keeps contacting them what is that ?

if some-one doesnʼt want contact with someone-else, but that someonelse keeps contacting them what is that ?

the seventh zen patriarch   blog  is the continuation of a genuine mystical tradition, unless you get in daily contemplative time and abstain to a significant degree from  “entertainment”  then you are just wasting your time and mine !

s.  you need daily contemplation to make sense of what i write which is different from filling oneʼs time with anime, j-pop and various ligotti crap !

you need daily contemplation to make sense of what i write


this is a question that  perhaps iʼd have asked toni packer

why do you do this

do you ever feel burnt out

life burns us out quick enough

why accelerate the process  ?

audio

the world has some deep structure for failure !

this world has some deep structure for failure

w

h

y

?

!

this world has some deep structure for failure !

w

h

y

?

this world has some deep structure for failure !

w

h

y  ?

this world has some deep structure for failure !

this world has some deep structure for failure

what i notice about  s  and  z   : o )  shall we call them, is they are too into the communal net scene, reddit hinduism and ligotti.net for instance

one thing it has taken me years to learn is what a stinking cesspool of total hubric stupid swine the net  is filled with 

that is, it very very selective for these no hoping puking idiots

so when you find yourself conforming to the viewpoints of these types that irl you would totally avoid then you have a huge problem !

they have a huge problem  !  :  o ) (


sepehr, the problem is that in your two  replies  you don't say anything coherent except this

“ i do get solitude but i notice the constant flipping over and destabilizing foundation is terrifying because this life is all there is.

there is nothing  ‘ great ’  about you experiencing infinity.  so what ?

actually you constantly being in communion with infinity makes you a nothing, and while you may take refuge in some solipsism and extreme barrier, i recommend you read derrida more about that, since he thinks it's ridiculous ”

this is exactly the same problem as zakaj, you both think you know the answers and i am wrong . .

what can i say ?

i reserve the right to mention you and zakaj occasionally in my writings as its a sort of decompression of both of you, it may take a year or so . .

we donʼt agree and i really want you out of my hair, and actually i donʼt think further involvement is healthy for either of us, in future i will make no mention of you except by a sort non non de plume ,  say  zyx  or whatever

g o o d b y e

health is the best wealth  !

: o  ( )

health is the best wealth  !

: o ( )

health is the best wealth  !

: o )

health is the best wealth  !

health is the best wealth !

health is the best wealth

a    poem  by susan schepp    [20:30]

snow covered branches of bare trees line the field

a ray of sunlight coming out of a cloud

passes by

the wind howls while the dead goldenrod and grasses

whistle and bend

where is the pain and sorrow of this world ?

my

r e p l y

and yet it bleeds from every pore in the ground

its interesting how both zakaj and sepehr have veered into what karl ove knausgaard calls   “ new stories which are always the same ”  [0:59 in link below]   that is a hollow and empty form of story telling, gabriel pradīpaka/sanskrit/paedo-muktananda in zakaj’s case and ligotti in sepehr’s

this is not the way of the patriarchs . .

i try to tell them, zakaj at least seems to understand he is getting involved with some contrary path and since he believes it true then he should follow it . .

sepehr doesnʼt want to get it but the reality is he is just doing the usual damaged person  “ piss unpleasantly in the wind ”  all his life . .

this is why an unrestricted public comments section doesnʼt work on blogs or facebook, people just push their own version of  “veering” ,  you the blog writer who does the work are just providing a public platform for complete arseholes, brad warner, lisa cairns and jeff foster are welcome to their immersion in that sort of filth ! : o)(

i really like this   interview  with karl ove knausgaard and john mullan, he talks about  “ shame ” ,  that is writing in an expository fashion about his family, friends and himself

its a real feeling that occurs after leaving the  “ writing zone ” 

apparently in norwegian culture being this frank is not permitted . .

iʼm dead certain he has been in effect been given permission by the freedom of expression on the web and blogs and actually its a new literary form, the complete exposition of oneʼs life like that !

“ yeah, by writing about something, you can identify something and you can see it, i donʼt normally see anything in my life, iʼm completely blind, but i can see it when i write about it ”   [1:01:30]

a monk asked joshu

how is it when we are not aware of ourselves ?

joshu  r e p l i e d

who is aware

who is not aware

the monk  r e p l i e d

i'm aware of myself

joshu finished with

not one, not one


a monk asked joshu

how is it when we are not aware of ourselves ?

joshu  r e p l i e d

who is aware

who is not aware

the monk  r e p l i e d

i'm aware of myself

joshu finished with

not one, not two

a monk asked joshu

how is it when we are not aware of ourselves ?

joshu  r e p l i e d

who is aware

who is not aware

the monk  r e p l i e d

i'm aware of myself

joshu finished with

not two, not one

my life 

just a sad, messed life

: o (

working for everybody

else

except

  myself . .

. .


o


(

my life 

just a sad, messed life

: o (

working for everybody

else

except

  myself . .

my life 

just a sad, messed life

: o (

my life

just a sad, messed life

: o (

“ Sometime in the 1940s, the struggle was seemingly lost

One day, Sibelius carried a laundry basket filled with his manuscripts into the dining room at Ainola and began feeding the pages into the raging fire in the stove

Aino, who would recall the event after her husband’s death, could confirm the identity of only one of the pieces her husband burned  —  the early Karelia Suite  —  but it is now considered a certainty that the Eighth Symphony was  destroyed  as well ”

bad move jean !

you could have just left them on a shelf, same effect except you can come back if you want, what is destroyed by fire or put in the rubbish is gone forever !

xzy  and i have been in various net correspondences for several years and he is now listening to this sort of  rubbish ,  very second rate chanting with a picture of a paedophile guru and he assures me he has not gone mad, but really what other explanation is there ?

an enemy is an enemy

but

the

treacherous

are

different

they

are

supposed to be

o n

y o u r

s i d e

an enemy is an enemy

but

treachery

is

different

they

are

supposed to be

o n

y o u r

s i d e

the enemy are the enemy

but the treacherous are different

they

are

your supposed

friend

savancy teaches itself

with

the

right

information

a day drifting past, another day gone forever


a day drifting past  another day gone forever ! : o (

a day drifting past  another day gone forever !

a day drifting past  another day gone forever

audio

in the course of editing this, i felt it was good but didn't understand why . .

then when listening to it for maybe the tenth time it suddenly hit me as to what it was a b o u t  . .

that is, the irretrievable loss of a day ..

: o (

nikolai astrup has a super competent wife   ! 

nikolai astrup has a   super competent  wife  !

nikolai astrup had a super competent wife

iʼm a sucker for women, the soft face, breasts and body, the hard grind   the intentional cruelty

iʼm a sucker for women   the soft face  breasts  body   the hard grind    the deliberate cruelty

iʼm a sucker for women   the soft faced  breasts body  the hard grind  the deliberate cruelty

audio

“ somewhere between hamsun and bukowski ”

immediately   unpalatable  to that or any sort of w r i t e r s  g r o u p

why would you get involved in that sort of twisted collectivism?

i'm a little poem and i'm afraid

that the new yorker won't like what i have to say

and my owner won't be paid !

the sea is red and the sky

is

green

is

what

i'd

like

to

say

but

the new yorker

fact checkers

will

be

outréd

!

i'm a little poem and i'm afraid

that the new yorker won't like what i have to say

and my owner won't be paid !

the sea is red and the sky

is

green

is

what

i'd

like

to

say

but

the new yorker

fact checkers

will

be

outréd

i'm a little poem and i'm afraid

that the new yorker won't like what i have to say

and my owner won't be paid !

the sea is red and the sky

is

green

is

what

i'd

like

to

say

but

the new yorker

fact checkers

will

be

dismayed

!

i'm a little poem and i'm afraid

that the new yorker won't like what i have to say

and my owner won't be paid !

the sea is red and the sky

is

green

is

what

i'd

like

to

say

but

the new yorker

fact checkers

will

be

dismayed

malware is benign,  ransomware  is not !


this poem

will

be

fact

checked

C H E C K

F A C T

pull it

out

of

a

hat

put

it

back  !

. .


o


(


)

i remember reading elizabeth bishop’s complaint about the new yorker fact checking a poem !

I      II

this poem

will

be

fact

checked

C H E C K

F A C T

pull it

out

of

a

hat

put

it

back  !

this poem

will

be

fact

checked

C H E C K

F A C T

pull it

out

of

a

hat

put

it

back

 lumbar hernia

a superb  MRI  showing a disk hernia and interestingly the disk is herniated on both sides, but its the disk material pushing on the spinal cord that is the problem !

my reply to the  poster  of that  MRI

  “ its a big bummer.  having two kids and then having to carry them around all the time hasn't helped ”

the material does reabsorb over time, you need to absolutely keep the weight off the disk !

most exercises and yoga just make things worse imo, don't bend from the waist and keep the weight off and it will eventually get much better !

surgery/microdiscectomy and epidurals are problematic !

“ our new research supports  early divergence

ten million years ago for the hominin-gorilla split and eight million years ago for the  hominin  split from chimpanzees ”

all my poems come unbidden complete and unchangeable . .

basically the prose is sorta set in concrete as well, though some changes can be made

so i found this   research  interesting and it fits quite well


everybody seeking an answer, religions, life, family, wife ,  children, grandchildren

there

is

no

answer !

everybody seeking an answer, religions, life, family, wife , children, grandchildren

there

is

no

answer !

everybody seeking an answer, religions, life, family, wife , children

there

is

no

answer !

everybody seeking an answer, religions, life, family, wife , children

there

is

no

answer

how can you write

about

improv

writing

of

poems ?

well

you

can

write

about

improv

writing

of

poems

!

. .


o


(


)

how can you write

about

improv

writing

of

 poems ?

well

you

can

write

about

improv

writing

of

poems

!

. .


o


)


how can you write

about

imporv

writing

of

 poems ?

well

you

can

write

about

improv

writing

of

poems

!

: o )

how can you write

about

imporv

writing

of

 poems ?

well

you

can

write

about

improv

writing

of

poems

!

how can you write

about

imporv

writing

of

 poems ?

well

you

can

write

about

improv

writing

of

poems

a quote of baizhang huaihai

‘ enlightenment ’  means the realization there is no more  ‘ enlightened ’  to  ‘get’ ,  that there is nothing to attain

my

i n v  e r s  i o n

‘ enlightenment ’  means the realization there is more  ‘ enlightened ’  to ‘get’ ,  that there is nothing but endless attainment ,  non ‑ attainment ,  futility and non ‑ futility !

one of the things that impressed me about the scots was their  loyalty  to the  “lairds”  who in fact were actually a treacherous lot and certainly did not reciprocate that loyalty to their tenant farmers when they came to sell their estates to the english !

Zakaj  speaks

Slovenian  (native),  English  (fluent),  Italian  (fluent),  Croatian  (semi fluent),  French  (medium level),  Japanese  (conversation only, can't read stuff except children's books)

my   c o m m e n t

i think knowing that many languages has damaged you, crimped the ability to think straight  !

your language   ‘ savancy ’  has used your brain all up  !

rules need to be broken all the time without appearing to break them  !

rules need to be broken all the time without appearing to break them

so, a very  tangible  side effect of antidepressants, not the way that those who use it, prescribe it or sell it tell, is it ?

everyone is after quick fixes, and if its not the quick painless fix it seems then they bullshit or are in denial . .

go r ot in hell you arseholes !        : o )

sexual tension ,  you just sit in that wasted space, just like you have sat in every other wasted space all your life

sexual tension, you just sit in that wasted space, just like you have sat in every other wasted space all your life

celibacy ,  you just sit in that wasted space, just like you have sat in every other wasted space all your life

celibacy, you just sit in that wasted space, just like you have sat in every other wasted space all your life

you just sit in that wasted space, just like you have sat in every other wasted space all your life


people like lisa cairns ,  jeff foster and brad warner hit a ceiling whereby they can't deal effectively with valid criticism

this limits them to really schizophrenic followers who are just blind to any notions of reality testing and validity . .

so they will always have a few followers, but they can never recruit outside this collection of nut cases !

eckhart tolle is an altogether more slippery character !

: o)

“ The full   analysis  is more complicated, as the researchers had to account for other factors, such as the age of the universe  —  it can't be too young nor too old for advanced life

It can't be too old because planets need to orbit around a hydrogen-burning star like our Sun, which is young enough that it has not yet reached the end of its lifetime

But the universe also can't be too young because a galaxy  (where protective halos reside)  must have time to undergo chemical evolution to produce metal elements

A high metallicity decreases the odds of having a nearby gamma-ray burst, since the stars that cause these bursts have relatively low metal concentrations

It's not surprising that Earth seems to occupy a favorable point in the researchersʼ simulations :  a place with minimal exposure to gamma-ray bursts, and at a time with many hydrogen-burning stars like the Sun, along with a high average metallicity

This special place and time may help researchers search for other possible locations of life in the universe ”

actually now i think about it, its no wonder einstein didn't like the  ‘ cosmological constant ’ ,  it implies the existance of many universes, a disturbing notion to one mapping out the rules for this this universe ! : o)

xyz  is a bitch, you pour all your heart into helping her, me you deceive !

xyz  is a bitch, you pour all your heart into helping her, me you deceive

xyz  is abitch, you pour all your heart into helping her, me you deceive !

xyz  is abitch, you pour all your heart into helping her, me you deceive

losing weight is easy, eat less, supplement to raise your metabolic rate and this includes iodine supplementation, moderate exercise and pay attention to the  types  of fat you ingest . .

or  evacuate  your stomach  . .

people are c r a z y  . .

excess weight is metabolic and micronutrient disease state !

the problem the north korean regime has, is that the logical path of de-escalation and getting along with its neighbours also removes the rationale for the regime's existance...

basically an emergency state of government based on external threat . . well illustrated by the fact that technically the country is still at war with south korea and the  usa !

kim jong-un is crafty and young . .

it's interesting what will/might happen !